Its not paranoia....if it is true. Facts which in most cases can be ascertained with a little research, going through / reading records, conducting interviews, and study.

Being prepared does not mean buying four shotguns, seven .308 caliber rifles, and eleven handguns...because you can not carry all those weapons and ammo to begin with. A handgun ( or two ), and a long gun -----> Shotgun or rifle.

You can only carry so much. Too much, even with a vehicle.....is bulk and/or excess.

You need to shelter, food, clothes on your back, a means of making fire and cooking. Having a large safe of guns does not provide you shelter, or put clothes on your back.


Green Shadow **/**

 

You can only carry so much. Too much, even with a vehicle.....is bulk and/or excess.




Green Shadow **/**

If your relying on just what you can carry your doing it wrong, thats a very last resort. And if its just what you can carry your not living long.

 

My wife knows Im paranoid..she deals with it...some has rubbed off on her too...plus,I really dont like people and trained my Shepherds to actively dislike everybody outside the family unit so we dont entertain a lot... upside is,my in- laws have never been inside the house...we sit on the porch some...with two Shepherds staring holes in their backs thru a window a couple feet away...they go away soon...its a good life

 

Sounds like me, after 22 years of dealing with people day in and day out and dealing with their problems I have little patience for people, after semi-retiring 2 1/2 years ago I run my own business from home. No one comes over to house and I don't answer the phone. On the last day of work I took my wrist watch off and never put it back on, no more rat race for me. I'm perfectly content with no one coming around, in fact I don't even remember when the last time we had people at the house. My wife and I prep at the beginning of every hurricane season, we know all to well what happens as we've been through it several times and have first hand experience.

 

Life is full of choices.

Look over the multitude of prep lists and do what you can within your working budget.

You should be able to build FAKs, stock the pantry with emergency foods, keep lighting, candles and such available.

Suggest some camping trips and...buy the appropriate gear.

Educate him and don't be afraid to engage him with the issues of safety and health.

Best of luck!

 

Putting another load of preps into the "bunker" last week, I started hyper-ventilating just thinking about being trapped in the confined space for a long stretch of time. I told my husband about it and he thinks I need to take a break for a bit. A bit of healthy paranoia is good but a panic attack isn't. Of course taking a break isn't an option but I'm working on relaxing more.

The kettle is starting to boil in too many arenas around the globe, gotta keep prepping.

 

Yeah its harsh when your partner isn't on board... in my experience if it comes to point of some one saying... " its me or your prepping:... then its on the level of needing the help of a professional.. my x and I had fundamentally different ideas about life.. prepping was just one of them. "It's the old you can't make a horse drink the water thing"

..I dont talk to my family about it ..some friends are on board some aren't. .

as to helping your neighbours that's hard to..but the one thing is if you can't take care of yourself first then... you can't help them in any way shape or form.. . I look at as if I can keep my self strong, then may be I can help them frind the resources that they might need in a crisis. .


And its not being PARANOID its being prepared because stuff happens. ..evey govt preps....the U.S. has FEMA and FEMA says prepping is smart ..I don't know what they call it in Canada but its there...

 

You are. He really is out to get your prep budget though, so it's justified paranoia.

Really, though, treat it like you're putting money in to savings/insurance policy. With interest rates being 0 and inflation being as nasty as it is, the value of your money is better stored in the form of a meal than in a bank account where it only loses value, whereas the price of a meal is ever increasing. You would be foolish to dump 100% of every paycheck in to savings for your whole life while living homeless on a street though. It's a matter of moderation. Put a little away here and there, but not too much. It'll add up soon enough.

That said, you do need to keep some cash on hand for things that can only be paid for with said cash. Do it intelligently and explain to him how it's rational to have a safety net just like grandma and grandpa used to do for bad winters or the occasional drought (probably more like unemployment for you). Don't go on explaining to him that the world's going to go Mad Max any day now. That's what scared the crap out of people and causes their normalcy bias to set in leading them to conclude that you're the one freaking out about something that can never happen.

Oh, and get him excited about the idea by encouraging him to find an area he wants to invest in. My wife was totally on board when she discovered that she can go shopping and act like she's being a responsible person preparing for her future at the very same time. Now instead of buying 12 pairs of shoes she found on sale, she goes hunting and comes home with a great deal on 12 cases of toilet paper (she used to regularly have nightmares about being stuck on the toilet or out in the woods with no TP, but she's taken care of that).

 

My wife made a joke a long time ago about my habits, but after I watched trends I was able to tell her to fuel up a few days before there were major rises in pricing. I was also able to anticipate rises in costs at the grocery store: Meat, Peanut Butter, etc. She knows right now that we're about to have a HUGE rise in costs for vegetables... Guess who wants me to go out and till the garden tomorrow so we can start planting really soon (we're still getting down in the low 30's here)?

Pay attention, mention a few odds and ends and they'll come around.

Oh, and now, when things go on sale we don't buy one extra - we buy a lot extra. I have a decent pantry and while certain things are very costly right now, I can jump into my pantry and grab something off the shelf that cost less than half the price as before. That's not paranoia, that's planning.

 

Wouldn't hurt to back off just for a little while and let things mellow. No sense in causing strife over prepping.

What actually has your husband upset -- spending money? If yes, stop spending $$ and start focusing on fitness and skills.

Upset about you potentially feeding the neighbors? Maybe he doesn't like the thought of his hard earned money going to feed folks who should be feeding themselves.

The time it takes to research and acquire supplies? Maybe he is feeling ignored and needs a little cuddling time.

If it was me, I would try to figure out the root cause of his displeasure.

 

Re-reading the OP, I think this sums up a very key point. What is the root cause? There are many good solutions proposed in this thread to possible root causes but no sense applying the wrong one.

 

Prepping has received some bad attention in recent years. It was just normal life when I was growing up.

We didn't go to the grocery store everyday and most of the meals were homemade.

Prepping should be a way of life in everyday living. Not something to fall back on.

Food, clothing and shelter are what you need to survive.

I don't prep for the end of the world. I prep for mini disasters like power outages, water loss, road conditions.

if your resources are small then you would have to figure in how long they will last and use accordingly.

stock the pantry and toiletries with the things you already use. buy them when they are on sale when needing to restock. pick a minimum of each to dictate when to restock.

I carried a backpack to work everyday. It wasn't a bob it was a get through the day bag if I need it. Set of clothes, snacks, drink, aspirin, hand sanitizer.

no need to go all commando with your thinking. Just have a backup for a way to cook,wash. and stay as comfortable as you can.

learn ways to prepare meals if your life is disrupted. learn what meals can be combined from leftovers to make another meal. Try to plan the meals you cook now to be better utilized.

prepping is a way of life, not something to fall back to. Having the ways to continue living in a disrupted time should not be a shock. It should just be a different way of doing things ,not something foreign.

Nothing wrong with having some candles in the closet. Think of what type of lighting you will need if power is lost. Will it need to supplement the heat also or will it need to be the type that doesn't heat the room.

Burning a coleman lantern in the hot summer time will only add to the discomfort. Have a few solar lights charging during the daylight hours to conserve your candles. use reflectors to direct the lighting where it is needed.

plan meals that do not need lots of fuel to prepare if resources are small.

figure out what type of meals will be best for the time of the year. A heavy meal that will get you through a cold spell that keeps the body warm.

prepping doesn't have to be associated with the end of the world type scenarios .

If you do the cooking and cleaning then incorporate being frugal with the way you do things. Learn alternative ways to accomplish the same task.

being prepared IS a way of life. Watch the weather , keep track of your supplies. Know how much fuel you have. plan your trips to cut down on as many trips as possible.

I don't know what you are doing now but it sounds like you may be stressing a bit.

 

My wife and I are a perfect balance. She thinks I'm nuts for getting to many guns, ammo, old school hand tools, nails, screws, etc. I think she has overdone it on food, salt, sugar, seeds, jarring goods, gardening tools. We both think the other has too much clothes, boots and such.

Oh, and we ain't going nowhere except to hunt, trap, and fish. So i don't have to worry about about having too much to carry.

:

 

For your first problem you have several things going wrong. First is letting worry manage your prepping. You could have a million dollars today and a year later your shopping spree would still leave you vulnerable to a number of disasters. Prepping is a whole lifestyle change. Part of prepping is surviving the modern world as well. Bills, mortgage, savings, retirement, medical issues, etc. You have to embrace the entire concept, including prospering in the modern world. If all you do is drain the bank account every month piling up food and batteries then you have ignored so many other risks. Let go of the panic buying and adopt an approach of measured prepping. You have to budget for your prep buying and stick to it. Then also realize that filling closets and garages with goods means nothing if you don't have the skills. Use your excess worry as energy to learn skills, not shop relentlessly. Finally, once you have restored your mental balance then you can reassure your mate that your efforts are worth it by showing your mate all the new savings, investments, skills, and cost cutting measures you have accomplished. Let your mate know that your family is more prosperous today than it was before you started prepping. Then take your mate camping or fishing for fun.

Your second problem is assuming you can save the world. Unless you can justify to yourself that your family group will be stronger by every new person you prep for outside of immediate family then assume they could be lost......and then get over it. Your duty is to your family. It is your neighbor's duty to take care of their family, not your duty.

You can't save the world and you cannot shop yourself out of disaster. If you cannot emotionally get past these key issues then you have problems you need to come to grips with before you are of use to your family in a disaster.

People new to prepping typically have some kind of epiphany that leads them to realize their life bubble isn't as safe as they once thought it was. Fear typically accompanies that epiphany. Fear is the mind killer. Fear only is useful during an emergency situation. Otherwise it is an acid that erodes your judgment relentlessly. Fear prepping will leave you broke and absolutely worn out. It can be brutal on a relationship as well. Channel that fear energy into a quest for knowledge, not a pile in the garage. Learn to see the larger picture too. That pile in the garage will do nothing for you if a pipe breaks in your attic and now you need 20K for a new roof fast. Or if your mate has an accident at work and needs to sit at home recovering for 6 months because they can't work. You cannot tunnel vision for your fears. You have to embrace the entirety of your life, realize it won't get completely covered fast, and then sit down and plan to build all your resources methodically.......for the rest of your life.

 

OP, I got my wife on board (mostly) with prepping because I started out by prepping for the events that are guaranteed to hit my area almost every year: Hurricanes, tropical storms and flash flooding from week long thunderstorm downpours. Last year the neighboring city flooded bad enough that a major road near a bluff collapsed into the bay.

While my immediate area does not flood, we still can't escape hurricanes, tropical storms and thunderstorms that knock out power. So I started prepping for that and branched out.

What region are you in? Midwest? Prep for a town wipeout from F-5 tornados.

West Coast? Earthquakes.

Northeast? Blizzards.

Washington DC? The next round of elections when we bring in a new round of communists.

See? Prep for what you will have happen to you first. Then prep for EMPs, alien invasions and meteor strikes after that.

 

Show him that stocking up on sales saves money, use some of the saved money for treats that you both can enjoy. Use your charm to make it worth it for him to look the other way.

If you can't work on more stuff, then work on skills, gardening, canning, sewing, hunting, fishing, reloading, physical conditioning ...

Ants and grasshoppers, some folks get it and some don't.

Don't go out or answer the door. Ask first, while trying to look hungry and thirsty.

 

Also, what if your neighbours need food and water, how could I deny them? I wish everyone would prepare!!!!

It's very nice of you to worry about your neighbor's survival, but as cold as it sounds, their survival is their responsibility...not yours. Worry about your own family. If they want to survive...they'll do the same.

 

I understand your sentiment, and I once shared it. But no longer.

Do you really want to be the person who let's the sweet old lady down the street who has baby sat your kids and given toy baked goods to starve over a two month disaster? I certainly don't, especially when I can very cheaply invest in some extra rice and pasta.

 

comparing survival today with how it was done in the 1700's and 1800's is ignoring population growth. Not dealing with a few tribes now, but millions of homeless, unprepared hordes.

 

My brother was not on board initially but with time he is making moves to prep.
Every one has to figure out their own reasons to prep.
Prepping is much like witnessing one's christian faith ,you do so in the hope that others can appreciate you experience ,but unless they feel the need on their own, your wasting time.
Or like trying to sell solar to your family, even though you've been using solar for years, and the contrast in your bills is significant, they are still unwilling to make a move .
I see folks that choose not to prep, they actually say they prefer to die, rather then suffer through a terrible event , these are easily overwhelmed with many challenges in life,
likely because they've not had to grow up, and become responsible adults, needing others to do their thinking(decision making) for them. " If things don't work, I can blame them"
Many folk look at it as too much work and investment .
How much is this going to cost?????
they want to see the bottom line in the investment, not in the total out come of having NOT prepped.
Some don't know how to deal with the secrecy of prepping ,every single thing they do is a matter of front page news ,bursting with excitement over the purchase of a new something. I can't show this off to my friends .
Why invest in a 50,k bunker and not be able to show it off ?
The Twilight zone movie comes to mind.
I try to explain to some that my accumulation is over the many years both goods and skills , but it takes action not dreaming.
And those of us that have endured life threatening events, can appreciate it all the more.
Then there are some in careless denial, the news shares the tragedy going on some where else and they are so disconnected it is of no concern. Fukushima and Katrina are good examples.
I would ask people how they felt about those events and simply say," it hasn't happened here, I don't care."
I find it amazing people can choose to be that disconnected from reality.

 

thanks

There is a lot of good advice from everyone. Thank you. We live in Calgary and no real disasters happen here, so I'm the odd duck out. We did have flooding last year and that never happens.
I don't think I have gone crazy overboard. I have only stored food, water, survival gear and a couple of weapons. Its not like the States with guns....city dwellers don't have them here. I'm the only one I know with them lol. I think that took him back with that as well.
We are so helpless in the city and can be in trouble with just a simple power outage. I am trying gardening this summer and bought heritage seeds and froze them. I don't know what I am doing though! It certainly is a life style but hard to acomplish living in a city where disasters don't happen!

Thanks again for the advice all

C

 

There is a lot of good advice from everyone. Thank you. We live in Calgary and no real disasters happen here, so I'm the odd duck out. We did have flooding last year and that never happens.
I don't think I have gone crazy overboard. I have only stored food, water, survival gear and a couple of weapons. Its not like the States with guns....city dwellers don't have them here. I'm the only one I know with them lol. I think that took him back with that as well.
We are so helpless in the city and can be in trouble with just a simple power outage. I am trying gardening this summer and bought heritage seeds and froze them. I don't know what I am doing though! It certainly is a life style but hard to acomplish living in a city where disasters don't happen!

Thanks again for the advice all

C

I wonder what would happen if the power went out in your city for several days/month. We've been through that, but we live in a more rural area of the US. A hurricane came through and cut everything down like a giant buzz saw. We were without power for almost week, but not far from us just 10 miles away they were without power for over a month. You never know when a disaster is going to happen, someday the power may go out and not come on for an extended period of time, thats the reason for prepping.

 

My husband used to disapprove of my prepping. This is what I did.

My husband and I decided that I would prep but "mind the budget". So, I decided to cook more frugally but every week took $5 out of grocery budget and bought food preps. Preferably something on sale. So I bought baked beans and rice and butter and dried food and such from the supermarket. In a bit I had a shelf full, and I was able to stop paying full price on those items. If an item was not on sale I just used from my prep shelf and instead I bought $5 of things that WERE on sale!

In 6 months time I was saving $10 a week on groceries, not including the $5 a week prep money. And, then I started spending the $10 saved on extra meat that was on sale. Once I got a good selection in the freezer I stopped paying full price on meats also, and then I was saving $20 a week on groceries.

I spent most of the money saved on the groceries on preps, including a dehydrator, an I forget what else. DH honestly thought the dehydrator was to make jerky with, so the kids and I made jerky. It was also a good way to teach prep skills without pushing it: the kid just thought we were making jerky.

It may be that your hubby is worried about the cost: above is a good way to get a pantry of stored foods without spending extra money.

It may be your hubby does not want to hear you talk prepping: mine did not! So I took my survivalist talk on-line and I no longer discussed it hubby unless he brought the subject up. He mostly worried about money and I honestly said "I am within the budget". I am not sure he believed my but I had obviously not broken the bank, so he let it be.

DH has somewhat come around, as a couple of friends of his say they prep also, and it made Christmas shopping easier. I asked him for a kerosene heater. And so he was spared the stress of figuring out what I wanted: he hates shopping

 

My husband used to disapprove of my prepping. This is what I did.

My husband and I decided that I would prep but "mind the budget". So, I decided to cook more frugally but every week took $5 out of grocery budget and bought food preps. Preferably something on sale. So I bought baked beans and rice and butter and dried food and such from the supermarket. In a bit I had a shelf full, and I was able to stop paying full price on those items. If an item was not on sale I just used from my prep shelf and instead I bought $5 of things that WERE on sale!

In 6 months time I was saving $10 a week on groceries, not including the $5 a week prep money. And, then I started spending the $10 saved on extra meat that was on sale. Once I got a good selection in the freezer I stopped paying full price on meats also, and then I was saving $20 a week on groceries. ...

Eighty percent or more of what we eat was bought ahead and either in bulk or on sale. Milk, eggs, bread and fresh veggies are bought fresh. Why pay the price of a small container of oatmeal when you can get fifty pounds for twenty dollars? I just bought butter at two dollars a pound and I didn't buy one, I bought ten.

I was sick about six years ago and when I was feeling better and able to do the shopping again, our cupboards and freezer were pretty bare. I turned it around very quickly by buying fifty pounds of potatoes, rice and oatmeal. We only ate on sale meat and went to a discount grocery to work on stocking the pantry with short dated convenience foods. Within a month our grocery and eating out budget was back to normal.

We really don't eat things like Mac and cheese and canned ravioli often but they are good to have on the shelf instead of ordering a pizza.

 

1) go camping, canoeing, hiking, something like that and buy the necessary gear. Those are preps.

2) buy flour, sugar, and salt in bulk because it's cheaper. It really is, especially at places like Sam's Club.

3) leave the news on the TV. If he's playing attention at all, he'll notice things are not right.

4) don't do all this at once. It's a marathon, not a sprint. Slow and steady.

5) realize that a good and happy marriage is more important than preps. There's a 100% chance a peaceful marriage is important to your well being and his as well. There is a lesser chance you'll need long term preps. Arrange your life accordingly.

Best of luck!

 

So what are you prepping for if you are under the impression that Calgary is 'safe'? If you are prepping for the Zombie Apocalypse, maybe that is why it's hard for your husband to get on board LOL

Here's some disasters that can hit you no matter where you are:

Divorce -- could you live on just your income?

Unemployment of you or your spouse -- how much debt do you carry? Could you survive for 3, 6, 12 months if one of you lost your job?

Power outage -- how would you heat your house? Lights? Keep food cold? Cook dinner?

Injury or illness -- are your bills low enough that you could make it on disability income?

Housing Bubble (big problem in Calgary IMHO) -- are you overextended in your mortgage?

Train derailment/chemical spills -- could you leave your house quickly with important papers and some personal items?

Crime -- have you secured your house from thieves? Have you taken a self defence class?

These are just some thoughts on the top of my head.

 

I feel for you, Coral. I'm on my own (divorced). I'm pretty sure my prepping would be a source of marital friction if I were married, unless I happened to be married to a like-minded person.

 

Location certainly helps, down here along the Mississippi coast I don't know
of anyone who doesn't prep now to some degree and you're considered an
idiot if you don't. A lot of folks learned the hard way in Katrina.

 

Idaho....This is a city with no disasters. Like I said. Some flooding a couple of years ago. People don't expect it here, and no.....I am not so deranged that I am waiting for zombies. Thanks for coming out though..
I make my own money and have always been self sufficent...comfortably. I believe things are changing in the world. Like flooding when Calgary has never flooded before. It was due to wonky weather. I have never been helpless....hence preparing. Zombies.....please.

 

Zombie's was not meant as an insult. It is used as a catch all phrase to encompass any and all mega disasters out there. You'll also hear the phrase 'Mutant Zombie Bikers' quite a bit on various survival forums. Again, it doesn't really mean that you are really expecting MZB' s, just that you are ready for anything.

I wasn't trying to be mean. So please don't take offense where none was meant. (That's also why I used 'LOL' after the zombie sentence.)

So to rephrase my previous post without using survivalist lingo......

If you are prepping for a mega disaster and you feel that Calgary is a pretty safe place maybe that is why your husband is having a tough time getting onboard.

See my previous post about different scenarios that are pretty mundane but happen quite frequently to folks and are worth prepping for.

Your husband may be able to see the logic of being ready for whatever may come your way.

 

Become skilled at hiding your preps. They can't complain about supplies they don't know about. I like to joke about the apocalypse to keep him guessing if I'm serious or not.

Normalcy bias is heavy brain fog and bringing them out of it is like trying to cure Alzheimers. So, I channel my energy into sustainability for myself, daughters and grandkids.

 

I have begun joking about it and saying.....well the food is good for 25 years. We can eat it on year 10 and we wont have to buy groceries for 6 or twelve months! its impossile to hide....I have bought a lot of # 10 cans that announce their arrival with bells and barking dogs lol....and he found my water stash downstairs. He opened a closet ant it was full of water bricks

 

Idaho.....thanks for clearing that up! I apologise. Guess I am a bit defensive.....because I do look bonkers preparing in a City with no tornados, earthquakes or anything that would give good cause. Instinct just doesn't sound rational.
Other than a gut feeling....there's no history to quote. That is exactly why my hubby doesn't understand. He isn't mean about it, but I can tell by reaction! Lol.
C

 

In North Idaho, you would be considered normal. Only weirdos don't prep here :thumb: