Amen, sister!

 

You go girl! I raised my daughter to be tough as nails. We all were in karate when my kids were growing up. She used to kick the crap out of the boys and once almost took our instructor's head off with a kick.

When one of her boyfriends got a little rough with her (he was playing around but you know how guys are, they are doing the macho me-tarzan-you-weak-little-jane thing) she punched the crap out of him. Nowadays she doesn't take crap from anyone. She holds her ground and tells it like it is.

So you stick by your guns and don't let the prevailing culture ruin your independence.

 

Amen, now get back in the kitchen and cook dinner! :

 

Thank you. I raised three boys and was aghast at how their girl friends (when they got old enough for that kind of thing) acted.

I have a friend whose daughter is now 20 years old and this young lady has never had a job. She has never cooked a meal, done laundry, been responsible for one single thing her entire life. She still lives with mom, gets allowance from mom and mom buys all her clothes, both of the cars she has owned, paid the insurance, maintenance and gas for said vehicles. She is a part time student at a junior college in her THIRD year. Her mom always has a long, laborious list of excuses for why her daughter cannot be expected to be a responsible adult, starting with her dad and I divorced when she was only 7.

I find it sad. What is going to happen to this young lady when her mother passes on. She will be alone and unable to function. It is not right for a parent to do their children this way.

This same woman has a son who just turned 16, went out and got a job, in addition to his school activities. He is looking to buy his own vehicle and talks about getting out on his own and being self-sufficient. His mom (same woman) makes no excuses for him. He is "a man and he has to learn to stand on his own two feet, no matter how hard it is for him."

If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes and heard it with my own ears I would never believed that one woman could raise two such radically different children.

 

Is this my life your refering to? Because it sure sounds like it. Only my step-daughter is 22 in December. She finally found a job she could hold on to for longer than 2 weeks. She works 9 hours a week........

No drivers license, no high school grad, can't take care of herself or even use public transportation; has to be driven everywhere. My wife defends her to no end.

My son: Turning 15 in Dec. was awarded highest academic achievement overall in class at jr. high grad. Also: Best Male Athlete.

He is putting in resumes next week to start work since the law changed and he can work part-time. He made the transition from jr. high to the best high school in town (of which there are four) with ease and is doing well in his studies.

I get so frustrated and resentful. And it's not only young females...it's males as well. People have spoiled their kids and rendered them helpless/mindless.

 

My girls are as tough as nails especially my youngest she just turned six and can do 50 push ups and I'm not talking about the girl kind. She is absolutely boy crazy and all the boys love her because she will play cars and spider man and swords or anything boys like. I hope no one breaks her heart when she gets older he may not survive.

 

hate to say it... but boys can be just as useless when it comes to situations like that...My scout troop were a rough and tumble bunch, used to being in the backwoods, did allot of real camping/backpacking, but we were weak in the recruiting department, the core 6 of us that was left merged with another troop... they were more of the "RV camping" variety... I don’t recall any particular incident where they cried, but the difference between the two groups were stark.

 

Yeah, it depends of the scout masters. I teach outdoor education and we get many different scout groups coming through our facility. Some of them are great with the scouts coming in like a military group, each knowing the jobs they have to do. Some set up tents, some set up the cooking area, some start preparing food, some start setting up activities. They have been trained to take responsibility and kids love that stuff. Then there are other groups that come in and the parents get into gossip groups and stop paying attention to the kids (someone else will do it) and the kids run wild all over everywhere. One kid trips over a log and starts wailing and the parents complain about the log being there. It gets to be dinner and they ask who delivers out to the area. Are you kidding me?

I've seen this in both girls and boy scouts. Some are great and a credit to their parents and some are a waste of everyone's time and also a credit to their parents.

 

My daughter wanted to learn to drive when she was about 12. I taught her how in my 1946 Chevy 2-ton. I told her if she could drive that she could drive anything. It had armstrong steering, 4 sp. tranny and a 2-speed rear axle. She's 18 now and although she isn't fond of driving a stickshift at least she can if the need arises. Shes also a pretty good shot and is definately the luckiest at fishing in the family.
She can also weld, run a torch and shingle a roof.

 

Shadow, I have been there many times, I'm 23 and proud to see that some of the younger generation is taking the time to learn how to be independent.

My husband, Cyber-Hazard, can tell you some of the things I have gone through.. Him and the guys call me a guy with tits.. LOL.

But nah seriously, my parents divorced when I was like 4 and to be honest I raised myself. And sadly enough my husband will admit I can out shoot him by a long shot. I'm one of the main reasons he got really interested in guns to start with. Was one of the only females to ever take state in 4-H firearms, I too was in girl scouts and found it as childs play to me when I was like 7-8.

Kept up what you are doing, Trust me it will help you in the long run..

 

Yea yea yea yea yea, you can out shoot me. So what? LOL I'm more of an "academia" oriented person. But we get along together nicely. After all, I don't want to wake up with a 9mm in my face if I make her angry!

 

try this one on for size.my wife had two children before we meet and i had two. she now has a 17 year old daughter aand 13 year old son. my two boys arre 6 and 7. she still allows her daughter to boss her around. when the girl wants something, all she has to do is threaten that if she don't get it, then she wants to go live with her dad. now, when the 13 year old boy wants something,he is told no or we don't have the money right now. he even acts like a girl because he thinks if he does, he will get what he wants too. neither on of them have an ounce of disipline,or respect. my two boys are the opposite. they understand about being fair and "earning" certain things. if the older two were placed in a emergency situation, they would be lost or dead in no time. when i try to teach how to toughen up, the wife tells me not to force things self-disipline, self-defense, respect, keeping your word, and the other basics on them. my wife has created the two biggest whine bags the world has ever known. my two on the other hand are well on there way to being young men. texas jack was very right, boys can be just as worthless as girls. i know, i see it every day.

 

When my daughter was little (up until she was 10) she was my little baby. My first born and the first girl born into our family since 1967. I did dote on her but I also taught her about the out doors. We would go on woods walks,I took her fishing and canoeing.Taught her how to ride a horse and shoot a gun. Back then I had an older Cessna 172 and would take her up with me on Saturdays for a couple hours ,showing her how to handle the A/C and teaching her about weather and the instruments.I took her to Dallas Fair park,there was a women's museum and it had Amelia Earharts' actual flight jacket on display.I've taught her stranger danger and what to do if we got separated. But now she is 12,going on 25. She wears makeup. She's into fashion.Watches the stupidest tv shows (Americas next super model,gag me with a cleaning rod!)More interested in music than the out doors. She's still a lion heart,won't take any guff off anyone, but I didn't raise her to be a priss pot.I told her "one day I will leave all my guns to you and your brother". She said she'd sell them and buy stuff she wants! Woe is me. Fortunately,I have a new son. He'll get all my guns!My boy is not yet 2, but already he is a real nipper.My wife says girls go through these phases. I had 4 other brothers growing up,so I'll have to take her word for that. But you are so right.Raising a girl to be a man's doormat is the height of cruelty.Maybe when she's older ,she'll come back to her senses. I was wild in my youth too. TP

 

My brother in law has vowed that his two girls will be able to make thier own living. Since odds are that most of the guys in thier generation are only good at killing phantom zombies, and other computer apparitions. I see a lot of young guys that refuse to work. So if you don't want to support your daughter all your life you better train her well now. BTW his oldest just graduated.In her graduation picture she is posing with thier John Deere 4x4 tractor. She can bale, swath, seed, and grew her own garden and marketed it to pay for her college.

 

You should meet my mother. She gets super stressed out and bawls over the most stupid and superficial BS you could imagine.

 

I teach my girl boxing and Tae Kwon Do. When she gets older I'll be teaching her Judo and showing her a bag of dirty tricks. She hikes, swims and will learn climbing techniques soon. She's still a toddler and knows every country name of North and South America, (we're working on Europe next week), the planets, the constellations, a Word of the Day, every day. English, Korean, as much Japanese as I can remember, and together we're working on German and Mandarin.
There's no way in heaven or hell my daughter's going to be a victim, or a haltertop-wearing nightclub floozie. I really don't understand how parents are okay with their kids becoming strippers or gang bangers. Asian and Indian communities do not allow their kids to go bad, and they certainly do not tolerate 'the state' or 'society' interfering with their children's rearing. Neither will I.

 

I was lucky enough to be brought up by a Grandmother who had been through WW2 and a mother who was born during it. The first had brought up her kids virtually single-handed after her husband never returned from Singapour, until she remarried. She was tough as old boots, but as gentle as a lamb. Me being a weak female, just wasn't part of any equation.

Weak females, regularly drive me potty, as does bad behaviour and some of my sex who act like they are hockers and dress like it. Then when things go wrong, they look all innocent, and say but I did nothing wrong!

Thank Gawd for wonderful Grandmas!

 

There is nothing wrong with being "lady like", imo. I still like guys who hold the door open for me and I always say thank you. On the other hand, if I get to the door 1st, I hold it open for anyone (male or female) close behind me. If they don't say thank you, I say loud enough to hear .... your welcome and then I walk off. Having manners and respect for others does not make you weak. Accepting a kind gesture does not make you weak. I get so angry at females who make smart comments to men who open doors or treat them with respect.

My biggest pet peeve would be parents who take treating their daughters like princesses to the extreme. I am sick of seeing teenage girls falling all over their fathers, batting their eyes at dad and talking "sweet" talk to get their way. When these girls do it to any other male it is called flirting. I don't get dads encouraging such behavior. It is a pathetic male, imo that gets his ego stroked by ruining his daughter and turning her into a princess. There are some moms that do it also but mostly dads that I see. I am tired of the mall lizards with their fake valley girl exaggerations, boobs falling out of their skin tight tank tops and fake press on nails. Their numbers seem to be growing and that is sad. Their parents have raised them to think their stink don't stink and I sort of feel sorry for the guy that ends up with them. He will have to be a gazillionaire and still he won't afford all that they think they deserve. Then again, if you marry a mall lizard, you bought what you deserve.

I have 3 sons and I've had to fight to teach them to respect females. It wasn't easy when girls today seem to accept the worst behavior from a guy because they simply want to be seen with a guy - any guy. Part of that training was that females have a mind, can do most anything a male can do and some things better and females should not be limited because of their gender. 2 of my boys now have wives and they are real girls. They are independent, strong and while they rely on their mates and my boys rely on them, they have no doubt (nor do I) that they could survive just fine on their own.

 

7
My biggest pet peeve would be parents who take treating their daughters like princesses to the extreme.

Oh gods, my daughter-in-law. I think she thinks my granddaughter is her own personal dress up doll. It drives me bonkers. And talk about no discipline. I can't stand to be around the kid. She's only 5 and I'm not even going to begin to deal with her until she becomes human, hopefully sometime around the age of 8 or 9.

I'm seriously hoping that when she hits her teen years she takes a 180 degree turn and tells her mom to take a hike.

As for my son, her father, he's pretty much useless to stop it. He's one of those "yes dear" guys. He didn't get that from me that's for sure. Probably from his father who's second wife has pretty much controlled him from the get go.

 

Parents need to stop raising their girls to be helpless little wussies and to be more prepared to deal with everyday problems!!

Unfortunately, this isn't just related to girls anymore.

I have two daughters and both of them say the boys nowadays are big wusses.

Of course, that could be because neither one of them was raised to be weak.

 

I know how to shoot, I like camping and the outdoors, I like fishing and I will learn to hunt when I leave the house.

just kidding. seriously though, a lot of males are brought up to be just as useless and emotionally unstable as your wishy-washy comrades. I think it is a combination of societal demasculation, crud in the water, and growing up in a mother only household. I REALLY could have used a father figure growing up. Back in the 80s, the only other male consistently in the household was Optimus Prime.

 

Least optimus had better morals to TRY to teach you than did Peter from family guy....Just think about that for a second.

 

I agree and I will tell you why I was a single mom who taught my daughter how to defend herself when she was about ten, now my house was never like living in the military but I was sure going to make sure in an emergency my daughter was going to be able to handle herself. Last year (she is now 22 nd living on her own) that training saved her life. She was walking home from work at 1am when a guy came out of an alley way and tried to grab her and drag her in the alley she toke the bag of candy she was caryying in her palm and smashed it up into the guy nose and then kicked him in the balls and ran, when she called me I almost had a breakdown and she just calmy told me she just did what I had always told her to do and it worked. I was never prouder and relieved.

 

yup, there are a whole lot of useless people out there. i have no problem with women being self sufficient, i think all women should know how to care for themselves, men too for that matter. however, i have also seen it taken too far as well, for example i always hold the door open for people, man or woman, because that's how i was raised. i have actually had women get mad at me! saying "like i can't open a #%$@ing door by myself!" seriously please don't be one of those...some guys are actually just trying to be polite

 

for example i always hold the door open for people, man or woman, because that's how i was raised. i have actually had women get mad at me! saying "like i can't open a #%$@ing door by myself!" seriously please don't be one of those...some guys are actually just trying to be polite

While my boyfriend was dating his previous girlfriend, she slapped him across the face when he held the door open for her!

 

most of this new generation IMO are not very strong or prepared for life.
but I am 60, and my parents didnt prepare me for life either. my dad told me
"you dont need to THINK, you just DO as you are TOLD!"
and I did just that when I left home. I did as I was told. I couldnt think for myself. I had to have a man tell me what to do. "take off your coat. sit down. shut up. go get dinner ready." etc etc
well that didnt last long. I ended up a single mom with a girl child. and beleive me, I raised her to be independant, to take care of herself, to THINK. and she is a smart girl. lots smarter than I am. married now with 2 kids. university grad. she doesnt do as she is told, thats for sure...she thinks. she knows she is a person in her own right, and she also knows she is responsible for herself and her life. see, I grew up dependent as that is what i was taught. but that also taught me that someone else was responsible for me. I had to unlearn that the hard way.
parents gotta start being parents and prepare their children for lifes hardships.

 

:thumb: Completely agree! Learning physical skills is one thing, but raising an independent, emotionally mature child with a sense of responsibility is another!

 

Props to your parents for giving you this gift. :thumb: Props to you for understanding its value. :thumb: Taking my daughter for our annual ritual to the gun range next Saturday. All day shoot, lunch and goody bag from the NRA.

 

Think about it from the other way. Most guys are wussies too. Do you want to raise your daughter to be lonely and unhappy with men, never finding one she considers an equal?

 

Might I suggest that you do the future a favor and volunteer to be a Girl Scout leader? I have found that rather than ranting about what girls do and don't learn in school and at home, I can actually make a positive difference in the lives of girls in my community by volunteering my time. Lead by example. By the by... I've been volunteering as a Girl Scout leader since I was your age and am now 39. If you want the world to change for the better, do something about your little part of it.

 

I would very much like to be a girls scout leader and I have been thinking about it for a very long time. My only concern is that the parents wouldn't want their girls in my troop, because we would actually do stuff such as *gasp* shooting and camping and fishing rather than just arts and crafts and cooking and 'girly' stuff like my troop did. Some parents might not want their precious little princesses corrupted.

I dropped out of Girls Scouts a long time ago, because all the girls in my troop were ****ing stuck up and snotty and none of them would be able to survive two days in the wilderness.

 

If she's a mall lizard she will never find an equal and she'll always have drama around her because she "settled" for an unequal. If she's a lounge lizard she hopes the wussies kept on being stupid and spending money on her. Somebody's got to have some gumption or we don't survive.

I was raised a lot like getFOODnow. Children were to be seen and not heard. I met my husband when I was 18. It used to drive him batty when he'd take me to a restaurant and I couldn't say what I wanted. He'd ask if I wanted to go to a movie, a walk or out to dinner and I'd always say ... you decide. My parents had made every decision in my life even down to which clothes to wear to school on any given day. They chose my friends, my classes and when I spoke. After we married my husband insisted I learn to make decisions. Between him and being an Army wife for 23 years I learned to make most decisions for myself. Now, I will admit we chose to live a Christian life. I am an independent person but my husband is the head of this house and he makes final decisions. This is possible because he is commanded to consider what is best for me and not have a heavy hand.

I have moved my family halfway around the world without his help. I have stayed with our children for years while he was off being a soldier. I have learned to paint the house, repair the roof, put in carpet, wallpaper, till up - plant and harvest a garden, handle medical emergencies without falling apart until medical personnel arrives, shoot several types of weapons, stock and put away food and supplies, drive a truck pulling a 30 foot trailer behind it and next week my son will teach me how to build a shed - ground up as I work as his helper. I do most repair jobs around the house. But, I draw the line with working on cars. I finally got smart and realized once I learn how to do something it becomes my permanent job!

When we have to learn - we do. That is why there is hope for many of these young people who are not being raised to provide for themselves. Imo, it is also why so many live their lives on welfare. They never have HAD to learn. While my parents said they wanted me to be independent, they raised me to be dependent on them. Then they got mad at me because I was shy and couldn't make up my mind. What saved me was my grandmas. One of them told me ... honey, one day you'll be grown and out on your own. Don't let no man beat, run around or browbeat you. Make your life your own, be independent and earn your keep... I pretty much took Granny's lessons to heart.

 

you're in a better organization now I think.