Bwahahahaha! I LOVE these kinds of things. It's good to be able to laugh -- especially when you can laugh at just how wrong the other person (in this case that would be youse guys!! ) is! (Ahhhh j/k ... You know I loves all youse guys long long long time!!

 

That gave me quite a chuckle.

 

Im good with all of it except the beer thing and looking at other chicks...other than that its spot on!

 

Men can see in 16 colors..? Since when...? Any man, start naming colors and see if you get further than 7-8.

 

Um..OK...

...let's see...

Black
White
Red
Blue
Green
Yellow
Orange
...
Purple
...
Grey
...
um...

...hmm...:xeye:

 

I would also add ,"if you test something or some one,to see if it will break ,it is likely to break .
And when it does, don't whine about it .
Creating a test, with out considdering the result of failure, is not the fault of the thing or person being tested, but of the one making the test with out the knowledge of how to repair it ligidimently."
Some women have admitted to me that they have taken a side they really do not believe in, and posed a test to their man, in an attempt to see where he will go with it .
By this deception ,when a man discovers it ,he begins to wonder how much else is a lie.
This display of distrust of a man's real feelings being shared ,only fosters more distrust, because you(women) are looking for it.
If you are busy drawing attention to the flaws , you loose the person.
If you are busy looking for the person you loose attention to the flaws.
Your choice.

 

men see three colors: green, red and very fast.

 

Personally I think #336699 is a rather nice color...

 

My husband talks during the show! Drives me crazy. I keep having to shush him and tell him to talk during the commercials!

Oh and aside to arleigh: My husband FREQUENTLY does the "Devil's advocate" thing where he will argue a side he doesn't believe just to get my ire up. I think he likes to watch me steam cause he does it all the time. It only makes it worse when he says "You're so cute when you're angry." :xeye:

 

When my hubby starts talking to me during a show I'm watching, I click the pause button. When he's done (or I think he's done), I resume my show. Unfortunetly I have to click pause quite a bit so an hour show may actually take me 2 hours to watch.....Sometimes. I think men do that on purpose.:

 

This is funny. Anyone who seriously thinks men should "rule" women deserves to have their nuts squeezed in a vice until they retract. Their statement, that is. No retractions of nuts from the vice will be possible. hehehe

 

This could well be an instruction sheet for Speedy vs world...

Ask for what you want. Hints are wasted.

I don't remember dates, dad please stop guilt tripping me every year when I miss my stepmom's birthday. Why don't you remind me before instead? And yea dad, I remember your birthday because my RL friend reminds me, she knows her sister and you have the same birthday.

Only come to me if you want help. Sure, you can cry on my shoulder and I can say the right words, but deep down I find this unsettling and I'd rather help for real.

RL friend, don't ask me if you're fat. You do have a big belly and you know it.

If something can be interpreted in several ways, I did actually mean the nice way. When I'm not nice, you won't have to guess.

I'm not a dang mind reader. Neither are you. You just project yourself on me and think I think like you and I don't.

People buy way too much clothes and shoes. Geez!

Why make things so complicated? Why were we even given language when it is used to confuse rather than to inform?

I remember once I entered a chat and I said "hi". Someone told me they didn't like my tone of voice and what was my problem? This is still a puzzling experience to think back on. But I guess it makes sense for people with "social skills".

 

The only thing men need to remember are three words.

I was wrong.

 

and...

I am sorry.

 

Hell, some of is women only see in about 10 colors. I refuse to wear anything that's not in a color on a basic color pallet if it's a color that's not on there, it's too much hassle for me to bother. LOL

 

the sixteen colors that men see in:
1 red 9 brass
2 blue 10 white
3 yellow 11 tan
4 orange 12 olive drab
5 purple 13 silver
6 green 14 copper
7 brown 15 grey
8 black 16 camouflage

corrected due to typo thanks heartlander

 

the sixteen colors that men see in:
1 red 9 black
2 blue 10 white
3 yellow 11 tan
4 orange 12 olive drab
5 purple 13 silver
6 green 14 copper
7 brown 15 grey
8 black 16 camouflage

Ummm you have 2 blacks..............How about aqua, lime or is that just a flavor? :xeye:

 

I thought it was spot on too except for 3 things.

1. Put the toilet seat down! A little courtesy makes us feel so special

2. Don't look at other women when we're there unless you want us checking out the ripped dudes while you're there.

3. If we look fat, and are, lie!! :thumb: I'd like to see how you come out after 3 kids, breast feeding, hormones, etc. Lying works best!: With a big hug is even better!:

 

You forgot that men always keep a running calendar of sports events in their heads, so don't expect to go out on those important dates, even if you haven't got a clue what the sport is.

Just because they did it once, don't celebrate too soon cause it may not be repeated. Their brains are just busy busy busy so simply wont remember it needs to be done daily/weekly etc.

Do not move their boy toys unless they can remember specifically where you put them.

Do not expect them to remember where they put a lot of stuff even if they have left it there but they still want you to know where it is and get angry when you don't.

If you want something in the house done, be prepared to wait a long time for them to do it. It might just be easier to do it yourself.

Clean bed sheets what are they? You will definately need to change those as swet, skin etc just doesn't register that its dirt.

Ps They do not understand the clothes, shoe, bag thing so don't ask them which one to buy, as bags all look like every other bag to them.

 

I guess what is frustrating is that I knew women that actually paid attention the things said in a conversation, and were not busy reading something else into it .
A few married women seem to hold a good conversation and a level head ,we can be good friends , I am good friends with their husbands as well.
Single women my age, generally do not "listen" in a conversation they seem to trying to analize every thing and desperate to get what they want . Lots of drama.
I try to be a good listener, but after a while I have nothing to offer, because the things they want to do involve deception .
I don't know any men that have left their wives out of bordum, not saying it isn't possable , I just don't know any.
But most of the women I know, are devorced and not due to infadelity on his part, but bordum on her part, by their own admission.
Guys don't get maried just to get out of their parents house, nor because all their friends are married .
Now isn't that true ?

 

I also get frustrated at men who assume that because they like sports, all men must like sports. My man could not care less about sports. I married a geek for a reason... so I wouldn't have to pay attention to that mind-numbing, time-wasting bull. The only thing that makes me more annoyed is women who are into sports. Ugh. It's about as useful and ridiculous as a fish with a bicycle.

Did I mention I hate sports?

 

My husband tells me all the time he married me because I'm not like any woman he had ever known.

I'd much rather hang out with the guys in the garage than the women in the kitchen.
I like sports, especially football and boxing (now known as that somewhat equivalent MMA).
I like working hard and getting dirty.
I like smoking cigars, drinking scotch and playing poker.

I don't like prissy women, although I've been accused of being a prissy woman because I like to clean up from time to time.
I don't like kids, though I had a few.
I don't like cooking, though I'm told I do okay at it.

While stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason, a person would do well to realize that it is dangerous to rely on stereotypes when dealing with individuals.

 

Some women don't like handbags. I'll take a good beer over a handbag any day. One purse is enough.

Some women also don't like buying shoes. The only reason most women have more than one pair of shoes is if you need to dress up for any reason, be it work or church, having a decent pair that goes with your dressy clothes is generally better than wearing sneakers. Just saying. But yeah, you only need 3-4 pairs. One pair of sneakers/casual walking shoes, one brown dressy pair, one black dressy pair, and one navy dressy pair. Unless you're going to some super fancy event, anything else is probably overkill IMHO, and either of the afore-mentioned colors of dressy shoes should go with just about any dress. I suppose one pair of winter boots doesn't hurt if you live in a state that gets snow like I do.

 

i can tell you every gun ive ever bought, however long ago it was, how much i paid, and how much i sold it for, i remember cars and dog,s the same way, you know the important things in life ....... but when it come to the small stuff like remembering the dates of berthdays and wedding anniversary, or when to pay my rent, i just don,t have time for the small stuff,

 

You know, this kind of stuff makes me very glad that I grew up with nothing but boys in the neighborhood.

I've never played those stupid head games.

I say what I mean and mean what I say ( or else I wouldn't have said it. duh)

To me guys should all pizz outside lol If I didn't have to undress half of my body to do so I'd be out there too lol ( it's cold in the winter and hot in the summer) ( jk people)

To me, looking with lust at someone else when you're with your mate is rude and disrespectful. It's not so much that he looked with lust it's the fact that he has such little regard or respect for me that he feels he can do it when I'm with him. Thats hurtful and pizzes me off. Especially when I don't do the same. I look to see if I know them. Other than that I have no desire to look. Thats why I'm with HIM. If I wanted something else I wouldn't be.

What could possibly be more important on tv that you would ignore your mate? Again, shows a lack of respect on either person who does this.

As for fishing for compliments by asking if I'm fat. Thats just a stupid head game in my opinion. I can look in the mirror to see if it's true or not. I don't need a man or anyone else to tell me whats right in front of my face.

$itching about clothes, shoes or toys is just another dumb game. If it's to the point where finances are in trouble then yea, $itch and get it in hand. But if it's not a problem then shut up about it.( although I'd rather buy ammo or supplies instead of clothes or shoes. but thats just me. I don't fit the stereotypical female. never have)

The majority of any of these "rules" ( from both sides) is just head games. It's stupid and wastes time and causes trouble when there should be none. Grow the %ell up and be honest and to the point in all you do with others. It makes life much more simple and trouble free when you are honest. Say whats on your mind with everyone. Get it " out there" in the open so it can be dealt with.


oh and beer is the staff of life...............just sayin *wink*

 

You know, this kind of stuff makes me very glad that I grew up with nothing but boys in the neighborhood.

I've never played those stupid head games.

I say what I mean and mean what I say ( or else I wouldn't have said it. duh)

To me guys should all pizz outside lol If I didn't have to undress half of my body to do so I'd be out there too lol ( it's cold in the winter and hot in the summer) ( jk people)

To me, looking with lust at someone else when you're with your mate is rude and disrespectful. It's not so much that he looked with lust it's the fact that he has such little regard or respect for me that he feels he can do it when I'm with him. Thats hurtful and pizzes me off. Especially when I don't do the same. I look to see if I know them. Other than that I have no desire to look. Thats why I'm with HIM. If I wanted something else I wouldn't be.

What could possibly be more important on tv that you would ignore your mate? Again, shows a lack of respect on either person who does this.

As for fishing for compliments by asking if I'm fat. Thats just a stupid head game in my opinion. I can look in the mirror to see if it's true or not. I don't need a man or anyone else to tell me whats right in front of my face.

$itching about clothes, shoes or toys is just another dumb game. If it's to the point where finances are in trouble then yea, $itch and get it in hand. But if it's not a problem then shut up about it.( although I'd rather buy ammo or supplies instead of clothes or shoes. but thats just me. I don't fit the stereotypical female. never have)

The majority of any of these "rules" ( from both sides) is just head games. It's stupid and wastes time and causes trouble when there should be none. Grow the %ell up and be honest and to the point in all you do with others. It makes life much more simple and trouble free when you are honest. Say whats on your mind with everyone. Get it " out there" in the open so it can be dealt with.


oh and beer is the staff of life...............just sayin *wink*

Well, RAT-spit!...... Here you go! Miss"K" goes NO where without it and it works!:

 

"If a man speaks in a forest, and no woman is around to hear him, is he still wrong?"

My wife's favorite saying!! lol

 

Replace BEER with GUNS and it's GTG! :

 

Beer is nice, beer is good!

When some old friends were in UK, they went into a pub and they ordered a dark stout for her and a light beer for him. They served him the dark beer... Friends shifted to get the right beers and the guy just looked at them like if they were crazy.

 

I love a good dark stout, especially dark German beer. I first had beer in Germany when I was an exchange student. (It was legal there, so of course all of the exchange students had to go out and have some, lol.) It was allowed as long as we didn't drive home.

 

Is beer a color?

 

No, beer is a food group.