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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
4 years active duty in the USMC. Honorable. Made it to CPL and on the way to SGT before injuries precluded me from continuing playing Marine.

Before the Corps, I was pretty frikin smart. Not a rocket-scientist or surgeon kinda smart. But smart enough to attend college and actually make it.

Now?

I get out and discover I have the brain capacity of a moderate-sized rock and wear a terd for a hat. I have seemingly no direction. Eyesight is crappier than usual and my hearing sucks. A complete loss of motivation spurred on by spending year after year of one crap-job after another and not getting hired into any significantly higher-paying jobs.

I attempted full-time college with the GI BILL but could not juggle that along with a full-time job that included hours of physical hard labour (the only jobs I seem to get....got mouths to feed). So I had to drop out.

Still attempting to go back but just have this intense fear that I can't "hack it" as a civilian.....which is not something I expected to feel coming out a confident, slightly broken young buck out of the Marines.

I feel depressed. Constantly exhausted. I feel as if I am worthless outside of the military where I excelled and thrived. I had to leave many jobs because I just couldn't physically handle them due to my injuries. I have a loss of focus and concentration.

I have had to move my poor family around from one hole in the wall to another (more than I did in the military). Had our first place burn down 4 months out due to bad electrical.....lost alot. Been on the run and broke as crap ever since.

Any other vets here have some ****ty-a$$ experiences after getting out? Please share.

What were they and how did you overcome? Been in SHTF/survival mode ever since getting out. Be nice to catch a breath and get a break, know what I mean?
 

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Inglorious Deplorable
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I don't know what to say brother.

There is a lot of support in the military - so much that we each become a small cog in the big machine. Not to say that we are not able to think anymore, US Soldiers and Marines do think.

But on the outside, we have too much freedom of movement. There is no longer a paved pathway that keeps us on the straight and narrow. We have become an indoor cat who is now lost in the back yard.

We can become overwhelmed with opportunities and options. We don't have support of the medics checking the purity of water in the buffalos. We have to do everything ourselves. All the support that goes with the structure has been removed and our lives can become a house of cards.

Poker anyone?
 

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Garbage Collector
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Pretty much the same here, I have all these incredibly anti social skills that if I use them I would go to jail.

Bounced from job to job for a little bit, the hardest adjustment was getting used to people having an absolute lack of discipline or sense of honor, no one is willing to truly "do whatever it takes' to get things done.

I went into Law Enforcement but I got tired of dealing with people who cannot handle the simplest of situations without calling the police, 99% of police work is dealing with stupid BS, only 1% has to do with actual crime. The more I am around civilians the less I like people in general, lost cause.

I think if the service members really know who they were "defending" quite a few would have taken a different career path, some people just aren't worth the effort.
 

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Hubris begets Nemesis
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7,751 Posts
4 years active duty in the USMC. Honorable. Made it to CPL and on the way to SGT before injuries precluded me from continuing playing Marine.

Before the Corps, I was pretty frikin smart. Not a rocket-scientist or surgeon kinda smart. But smart enough to attend college and actually make it.

Now?

I get out and discover I have the brain capacity of a moderate-sized rock and wear a terd for a hat. I have seemingly no direction. Eyesight is crappier than usual and my hearing sucks. A complete loss of motivation spurred on by spending year after year of one crap-job after another and not getting hired into any significantly higher-paying jobs.

I attempted full-time college with the GI BILL but could not juggle that along with a full-time job that included hours of physical hard labour (the only jobs I seem to get....got mouths to feed). So I had to drop out.

Still attempting to go back but just have this intense fear that I can't "hack it" as a civilian.....which is not something I expected to feel coming out a confident, slightly broken young buck out of the Marines.

I feel depressed. Constantly exhausted. I feel as if I am worthless outside of the military where I excelled and thrived. I had to leave many jobs because I just couldn't physically handle them due to my injuries. I have a loss of focus and concentration.

I have had to move my poor family around from one hole in the wall to another (more than I did in the military). Had our first place burn down 4 months out due to bad electrical.....lost alot. Been on the run and broke as crap ever since.

Any other vets here have some ****ty-a$$ experiences after getting out? Please share.

What were they and how did you overcome? Been in SHTF/survival mode ever since getting out. Be nice to catch a breath and get a break, know what I mean?
On the contrary, you're not stupid. You're smarter than most. You recognize that you need some help and perhaps a break, so are asking your peers for some direction and advice.

Look for small victories. They add up. Measure yourself against where you were 6 months or 6 weeks ago.

Like isn't linear. It's filled with sprints and setbacks. You're in retrograde right now. That could change tomorrow. Or the next day. Or the day after that.

The most important strength is mental. Don't give up. Ever.
 

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Registered
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I spent 10 years in the Teams and left unexpectedly after a skull fracture and neurological problems.

All at once I lost my career, my house, my health, got divorced, and ended up one angry mother****er! :taped:

Since then in '00, I've been in construction earning low wages in rough conditions. Went from working with some of the best, brightest, motivated people to working with crack heads and drunks. Talk about culture shock! :rofl:

All I can say is keep driving on. Take it One day at a time. What's worked for me is to keep using the discipline and motivation that was valued in the military and apply it to the civilian work world.

Some employers value it, others just need a body. If you find yourself working for a scumbag, look for another job. I've let my stubbornness and drive to succeed keep me at a job that I should have left long ago.

Good Luck
 

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Banned
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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Pretty much the same here, I have all these incredibly anti social skills that if I use them I would go to jail.

Bounced from job to job for a little bit, the hardest adjustment was getting used to people having an absolute lack of discipline or sense of honor, no one is willing to truly "do whatever it takes' to get things done.

I went into Law Enforcement but I got tired of dealing with people who cannot handle the simplest of situations without calling the police, 99% of police work is dealing with stupid BS, only 1% has to do with actual crime. The more I am around civilians the less I like people in general, lost cause.

I think if the service members really know who they were "defending" quite a few would have taken a different career path, some people just aren't worth the effort.
That's a big one for me. I can't stand "civvies"....


I make no attempt to make friends or "network" which probably is a bad thing when trying to find a job that's finally a "good fit" for me (which THE only job that fit me was being a Marine)....


....I feel like I am the only one that REALLY sees this craphole for what it is while everyone else is walking around shopping for useless crap, worrying about stupid, pointless **** in life that doesn't matter and going off about stuff I have no interest to hear about all while ditty-bopping to some Lady Gaga and jibbering about "Jersey Shore" or whatever retarded show that is....

....yet these completely oblivious morons have frikin everything given to them. No worries in life. Living it up. I just don't get it.
 

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Old Soldier
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Look at the bright side. You could be a Vietnam Vet, and not only would you feel the way you do now, but people would have been hating you and calling you a drug crazed, psychotic, baby killer.
Anybody ever spit on you while you were in an airport in uniform?
Not that I feel like I'm a "victim" or anything. But I don't feel much empathy for guys my age that never served in the military.
 

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Still here...
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I'm sorry you're going through this.

Getting away from school for years makes it harder to go back. When it comes to the brain, it is a use it or lose it. The good news is that it's not gone forever. Try going back again, but maybe PT rather than FT until you find balance. Then you might consider adding a class. I don't know where you went the first time, but make sure you go someplace that's geared towards adults. Most community colleges and some state schools don't know how to deal with adults with life experience.

As for the lack of motivation, it sounds like you might be depressed, which would not be surprising giving your recent history. Depression doesn't have to be the overwhelming, "can't get out of bed" kind that most people think of. It can be "exhaution." Please consider seeing someone, and not an MD - most are not trained to diagnose treat depression. Sometimes just awareness of depression can help lessen it.

You've taken some hits, but you have a lot of strengths. You're able to support your family even through the struggle, you had a solid service record, you understand hard work, have values, and you keep trying. You've shown a lot of resilience. I'm sure you have many more strengths. Don't forget about them; use them.
 

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Garbage Collector
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They go about life without a clue because most of them have never stared down the barrel of a weapon, or smelled gunpowder and fear in the air, they will never know what it means to truly be alive. There is something about close combat that most will never understand, almost a thrill yet nerve racking all at the same time.

There is something about the bond you develop with people under extreme stress that cannot be replaced.

I eventually got lucky, got decent job bought a house, but I would trade all of it to go back active duty without hesitation.

I do think the key is to use the discipline to your advantage and just drive on, know that a lot of your fellow vets feel exactly the same frustration as you.

Semper Fi
 

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Old Soldier
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5,072 Posts
That's a big one for me. I can't stand "civvies"....


I make no attempt to make friends or "network" which probably is a bad thing when trying to find a job that's finally a "good fit" for me (which THE only job that fit me was being a Marine)....


....I feel like I am the only one that REALLY sees this craphole for what it is while everyone else is walking around shopping for useless crap, worrying about stupid, pointless **** in life that doesn't matter and going off about stuff I have no interest to hear about all while ditty-bopping to some Lady Gaga and jibbering about "Jersey Shore" or whatever retarded show that is....

....yet these completely oblivious morons have frikin everything given to them. No worries in life. Living it up. I just don't get it.
This is why I only associate with two types of people - veterans and recovering alcoholics. You know, my "own kind."
Vietnam Veterans Of America, Veterans Of Foreign Wars, AMVETS, American Legion, Society Of The Fifth Divison.
Find a local group, I'm sure there must be an orginazation for GWOT veterans.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Look at the bright side. You could be a Vietnam Vet, and not only would you feel the way you do now, but people would have been hating you and calling you a drug crazed, psychotic, baby killer.
Anybody ever spit on you while you were in an airport in uniform?
Not that I feel like I'm a "victim" or anything. But I don't feel much empathy for guys my age that never served in the military.
I've had only one strange experience where this group of folks "turned me off" after finding out I was a former Marine....


....but otherwise, nothing like that. Thank goodness. I would have "snapped" if it was seriously like it was back then....

....not to poke fun but it would be something out of "First Blood"......running down Main Street USA with an M60 and a couple hundred rounds belted around me tearing **** up.....

...I have alot of support from my wife's family but that only goes so far and you don't want to be a burden. Just want to be my own man, on my own feet, supporting my own family and no matter how hard I try....just seems out of reach...

...one of those days. Thanks for the ear, brother.
 

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Still here...
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....I feel like I am the only one that REALLY sees this craphole for what it is while everyone else is walking around shopping for useless crap, worrying about stupid, pointless **** in life that doesn't matter and going off about stuff I have no interest to hear about all while ditty-bopping to some Lady Gaga and jibbering about "Jersey Shore" or whatever retarded show that is....
LOL. I felt that way for a LONG time. I still do for most of it, but I've come to accept that is part of being a 'sheeple' and we're not 'sheeple.'

Since you're not comfortable with civvies, is there a group of prior military that you can associate with? You can be around people with similar values and do some networking.
 

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Experiment 626
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First off, you should seek the help of a therapist. They get paid to help people in your position and can give you much better advice than anyone on this list.

That said, one thing I can suggest is looking at a line of work totally different than anything you did in the military. I was EOD, my job was blowing things up and disecting bombs. Now? Most days I am surrounded by screaming children at my job and most people would not even believe I was in the Marines without proof.
 

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Improvise Adapt Overcome!
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Sounds like you are burned out. It's not a matter of losing your intelligence or thinking power. It's a matter of being over stressed, over worked, and likely under rested.

I am not sure what you are studying career wise, however military personnel, Marines especially are extremely physical people. You may be missing the mark with your studies. Have you thought of going into the physical fitness biz?

There are a ton of ways to do it. For example, a physical therapist's assistant is an easy degree to get, and pays fairly well. A personal training cert is also not difficult to earn.

By going that route, you will be able to focus on a career that begins to rebuild you and will put you in a career environment where you are surrounded by stronger, more positive people at the same time.

You can even sell it to your family as a "Fall Back" job, or a side job to earn extra money while you get back on your feet. Over time, you can build personal training to the point where you won't need another job.

Gyms and health clubs are very popular. I bet in a 25 mile radius of where you are at, you could get any number of entry level positions with a simple personal training cert.
 

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Inglorious Deplorable
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I think we just have an adverse reaction to the "American Idol" Syndrome.

I agree with the civvy aspect. Where we expect there to be a structure or at least a plan, we find sheeple. - and by definition, they are clueless. How do you fix that. How can you deal with that. You Can’t.
 

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war comin, choose a side
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Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Expected. Isnt that what the acronym marine stands for? Just doggin you, because i was in the navy. :) i have a similar experience. When i got out of the military, the only job i could find was a busboy! I go and serve this country HONORABLY, and then cannot get a job. How messed up is that? I was even to the point of going back and re-enlisting in the marines or army, just so i could do something. Either way, i didnt re-enlist. I found my wife and now i am starting my own security supply company. I guess everything happens for a reason.
 

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Nemo Me Impune Lacessit
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Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Expected. Isnt that what the acronym marine stands for? Just doggin you, because i was in the navy. :) i have a similar experience. When i got out of the military, the only job i could find was a busboy! I go and serve this country HONORABLY, and then cannot get a job. How messed up is that? I was even to the point of going back and re-enlisting in the marines or army, just so i could do something. Either way, i didnt re-enlist. I found my wife and now i am starting my own security supply company. I guess everything happens for a reason.
yip thank God for wifes.
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Expected. Isnt that what the acronym marine stands for? Just doggin you, because i was in the navy. :) i have a similar experience. When i got out of the military, the only job i could find was a busboy! I go and serve this country HONORABLY, and then cannot get a job. How messed up is that? I was even to the point of going back and re-enlisting in the marines or army, just so i could do something. Either way, i didnt re-enlist. I found my wife and now i am starting my own security supply company. I guess everything happens for a reason.
I did try and re-enlist......:eek::


The Marines was a no-go so I went to the Army, etc.....but they didn't want me back due to my injuries and possibly having to pay out on them which they got off not doing the first time I was in....:mad: (even though I could pass the physical just fine)


But you're right.....I just need to weather the storm and something has GOT to come around at some point, right?

Starting my own business is the route I wanted to go being a stubborn individualist....good for you. That's awesome.
 
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