I don't like the "whats wrong game" either. Are you sure she hasn't asked you a thousand times to take care of something, and now she's just sick to death of repeating herself to no avail?
What's wrong? The same sh*t that was wrong last week, and the month before, and the month before that.
If you brought flowers on occasion, it may be a saving grace, if you go out of your way to say.. fill the gas tank, or wash the car, or take out the trash without my asking – anything to take some of the workload off of me - we wouldn’t have a problem. But if you don’t care enough to put forth the effort, we do, and that’s how women view it:
"You don’t care enough” to spend 5 fu**ing minutes of your time to fill the gas tank for us. You’d rather skip-it and tell us “you need to get gas before work” than do it yourself. This pisses me off because I’d take the moment to set you up, I wouldn’t procrastinate and shove the job off on you. Do this type of thing all the time, and you will have resentment.
Women equate what you do outwardly with how much you care, or whether you are considering them ahead of time, and not as some afterthought.
We tend to think of our responsibility to family first, and we cannot understand how you must be asked every week to do the same task i.e. taking out the trash. You know it’s there, you know it needs to be done, so why do we have to ask every week, over and over again? We are, essentially, still responsible for making sure it gets done – the actual carrying-out it not so much the issue, the taking responsibility for the task is.
Do this with the small things:
Take responsibility for it, don’t make me have to remind you to see it done. Relieve me of having to even think about it, and allow me to trust and rely upon you to take care of it. I will feel as if I can trust my spouse, like I am not alone in the chores, and that you “have my back” – I can rest assured you are “handling it”. This is appreciated by women.
Take this a step further, and actually go out and start her car, de-ice it, and get it all warm and toasty for her before she leaves for work, or sweep the front porch before she gets home, or some other small thing that requires little effort, and you'll score big points in the “he cares about me” factor.