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married 43 yrs

Life is a roller coaster ride in all aspects. You have to share to have a life long partner. God helps us with fading eyesight as we get older too, this solves the so called ugly looking issues we face. I knew a fellow years ago that was in his late 30's. He was in no way a poster child in looks or personality. He had never been married and desperately wanted to be BUT, he had unrealistic demands for a wife. #1. she had to be a virgin. #2 good looking and have a job, and the list went on. I told him learn to enjoy his single life for #1 on your list is virtually non existent for anyone of legal age. Plus pal you are not a prize keeper yourself. Focus instead on a loyal lifelong friend who is not afraid of work should be your list.
 

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I married relatively late in life, mainly because I spent far too much time with a woman who was content to just date. At one point, my father tried to warn me out of that relationship, but of course I didn't listen.

I finally moved on and eventually did get married, but now that relationship has become unstable. I have no idea what the next 6 months-1 year will bring, there is much uncertainty.

If things eventually do fall apart, then I will probably just assume I'm not meant to be with anyone and leave it at that.
 

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I married relatively late in life, mainly because I spent far too much time with a woman who was content to just date. At one point, my father tried to warn me out of that relationship, but of course I didn't listen.

I finally moved on and eventually did get married, but now that relationship has become unstable. I have no idea what the next 6 months-1 year will bring, there is much uncertainty.

If things eventually do fall apart, then I will probably just assume I'm not meant to be with anyone and leave it at that.
Woman nowadays are ticking time bombs. I talked with a guy that went overseas to get a wife. So far so good. But time will tell.
 

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Crazy Cat Lady
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If you want to learn about a woman, look at her mother.

Good thing my husband didn't. She was an alcoholic, married 7 times, cheated on at least one husband, heavy drinking, bipolar, multiple suicide attempts. Yet she was married 7 times.

7 times a guy said "She's the only one for me, and this time it will stick". :eek:

So you will forgive me on some of my marriage posts - I didn't have a good example and trying to find my way.

One of the best compliments I got was after my husband's accident. A friend was giving me rides to/from the hospital. One day he said "I want to find a woman who loves me the way you love him". :)
 

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Live Free or Die
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Nowadays?!?
It has gotten worse over the years. I am still friends with and speak regularly with 2 women I was previously engaged to. One in the 80s and the other in the 90s. I still get along with and speak to 2 girls I dated in high school. I get along with every girl I have ever had a significant relationship with except my ex-wife. This leads me to believe that the problem there is not me.
 

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Live Free or Die
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If you want to learn about a woman, look at her mother.
Yeah, that doesn't always work. My ex's mother is a great woman. Were I 10 years older or she 10 years younger, I would date her. She is a widow. When I met her mother and got to know her, when I considered the fact that she went to a spirit filled church, when I considered the fact that she was interested in investing for the future, and when I added in other considerations; I thought I had hit the jackpot. It was all a lie. When her father died, her true self came out. Bitch, whore, **** from hell. She was a damned good actress. I give her that.
 

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My 1st marriage was a disaster, my 2nd lasted 30 years, I lost my wife to cancer almost 5 years ago. For 3.5 years, I was living the bachelor life, then I started dating, finally met one that was good to me and good for me.

We live in separate places, spend nights together on weekends, we both work. I told her I was not getting married again, she's okay with it. We travel together, our politics, 2A interests are aligned. She may move to Florida in a couple of years, but would visit when I was retired fairly often.

I just had gotten used to single life, I had my quiet time, my cats, my cars. I have a lot invested in my house and love the summers here, Florida I'd roast to death. I tolerate cold better as time goes on. So maybe this thing will go the distance, maybe it won't, time will tell.
 

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It has gotten worse over the years. I am still friends with and speak regularly with 2 women I was previously engaged to. One in the 80s and the other in the 90s. I still get along with and speak to 2 girls I dated in high school. I get along with every girl I have ever had a significant relationship with except my ex-wife. This leads me to believe that the problem there is not me.


Pretty much the same here, I get along with some of my exes better now than when we were together.

I know we now live in the world of “micro-aggressions” , “safe spaces” and “47 genders” so I admit things are getting ridiculous but the whole “ticking time bomb” thing reminded me of one ex in particular who I came to refer to as “the volcano” and not just because she was a redhead

There was no way to tell in advance when or why she’d blow!

Don’t get me wrong, I think my current woman puts up with more from me than I do from her, I can admit that.
I’ve always been a huge fan, time bomb, volcano, or whatever.
 

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I found my ex in church. She was a long time member. She faked it well.
same here...number one was a conservative, raised in church, graduated bible school, bleah, bleah, bleah

there were red flags, I chose not to regard them....bad on me....got a great kid out of the deal, he's da bomb

my current wife is an actual Christian, with actual moral fortitude.... and legs that are capable of staying closed for any other man than me :)
 

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I was married 40+had kids ,had our ups and downs she chose influences away from me and we parted drove me nuts .
She has sense passed away and frankly I don't have the need for more insanity.
I have male and female friends but I keep my distance and there is peace that way .
I use to be a extrovert and met people regularly even strangers but now not so much.
I'm happy with my life ,God watches over me and intervenes for my needs . People that choose to become a problem eventually become too busy with other things and leave me alone.
I do not worry about dying alone ,most people do actually .
I actually have lived longer than I had expected given a few events that God's intervention saved me.
A mistake people ,make is thinking I can fix them ,WRONG, WRONG, WRONG .
Marriage changes people some good, some bad, some toxic, some amiable . you don't know till the knot is tied . Fantasy is the worst . I have known people that live together for years and right after the wedding get divorced.
 

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Nowadays?!?
It has gotten worse over the years. I am still friends with and speak regularly with 2 women I was previously engaged to. One in the 80s and the other in the 90s. I still get along with and speak to 2 girls I dated in high school. I get along with every girl I have ever had a significant relationship with except my ex-wife. This leads me to believe that the problem there is not me.
Yes, I do believe that "nowadays" women are probably far worse than women a few decades ago.

Part of it is cultural, part is economic, part is courts... all is a product of toxic feminism.

In short, when women are brainwashed the men are the enemy and women can do everything and be independent, they become very hostile toward men. We see this all the time in society.

They want to be equals but don't want to actually do equal work or take equal responsibility or really anything on the unfavorable side of the equality equation. They want to wear slutty outfits and be pursued but will cry harassment when that happens. They want to get drunk in clubs and grind up on men but cry sex assault if he touches her. They want to stay out and be irresponsible and lead men on and sleep around but claim rape if they regret their decisions.

They want the education, the career, the perfect family with 3 kids, the romance on the side, and then when it all falls apart they want the divorce, the house, the bank account, the alimony, the new lover and marriage...

It's not lost on a lot of American men that American women are generally damaged goods and why so many American men seek out less "feminized" foreign women.
 

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I am still friends with and speak regularly with 2 women I was previously engaged to. One in the 80s and the other in the 90s.
I am friends on FB with the person I wrote about above... The one who only wanted to date but I stayed with her for years anyway. I don't blame her, I could have left anytime, it was my choice to stay as long as I did. We don't speak directly all that often, but she sometimes comments on my FB posts and I hers.

She eventually got married too, a few years after I did. But then he got cancer and passed away a couple of years ago. So now she's back to being single again (widowed, actually).
 

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I am friends on FB with the person I wrote about above... The one who only wanted to date but I stayed with her for years anyway. I don't blame her, I could have left anytime, it was my choice to stay as long as I did. We don't speak directly all that often, but she sometimes comments on my FB posts and I hers.

She eventually got married too, a few years after I did. But then he got cancer and passed away a couple of years ago. So now she's back to being single again (widowed, actually).
Yeah, with one of my high school girlfriends I really dodged a bullet. She ended up having 6 kids by 3 men. She is now on her fourth marriage. She is a lot of fun and still very hot even in her 50s. One time she told me she would never have cheated on me. I just said "good to know" and quickly changed the subject. One funny thing. Her first born is named after me lol. I wonder how her first husband took that or if he ever found out? He and I never met.
 

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Yeah, with one of my high school girlfriends I really dodged a bullet. She ended up having 6 kids by 3 men. She is now on her fourth marriage. She is a lot of fun and still very hot even in her 50s. One time she told me she would never have cheated on me. I just said "good to know" and quickly changed the subject. One funny thing. Her first born is named after me lol. I wonder how her first husband took that or if he ever found out? He and I never met.
As I was preparing to retire from the Army last year, people I worked with would inevitably ask, "What are you going to do after you retire?"

One my joke answers was, "Move to Alaska and become a mountain man."

That answer doesn't seem like so much of a joke anymore...
 

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Crazy Cat Lady
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Lead, we do agree on the slutty outfits (I see a lot at work).

I think the trick is she wants the attention from a man she deems suitable, but will cry harassment if the "wrong" guy pays her attention.

That is the problem my friend had, the one who had the totally unrealistic list. He would ogle those women and they would get offended, because he was average looking and not making a ton of money.

I wear modest clothes. I get "attention" at home. And, after all, how much do you need?

IMO as a woman it only takes one guy's "attention" to make me feel attractive and desirable. Probably TMI.
 

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Isaiah 41:10, Acts 5:29
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I married relatively late in life, mainly because I spent far too much time with a woman who was content to just date. At one point, my father tried to warn me out of that relationship, but of course I didn't listen.

I finally moved on and eventually did get married, but now that relationship has become unstable. I have no idea what the next 6 months-1 year will bring, there is much uncertainty.

If things eventually do fall apart, then I will probably just assume I'm not meant to be with anyone and leave it at that.

I hope you two can work with your Pastor or a good counselor to do some healing and fixing.

Prayers...
 
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