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Should kids physically defend themselves

  • YES

    Votes: 153 98.1%
  • No

    Votes: 3 1.9%
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Zombie Ron Paul 2016
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
There is a kid on the block who's kind of a jerk. He's been picking on my 5yr old and his friends. The kids parents are trash so talking to them is out. Ive talked to the kid but he's a smart ass. I'm pretty sure my son can take him, I've taught him a bit and he's got a good punch. I'm really not morally opposed to this, just wondering where it sits from a social stand point.
 

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Zombie Ron Paul 2016
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Discussion Starter · #2 ·
I guess the question should read "Should kids defend themselves physically?"
Oh and the other kids 5 or 6 as well
 

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Seeker of Truth
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216 Posts
Just for an FYI:
My son had the same issue at school and no one would/could do anything. I told him to do what he felt he had to do. One day the boy went to far and my son laid him out. He got suspended because he wouldn't apologize. When he got home I ask him why he wouldn't apologize. He said he wasn't sorry and didn't want to lie. I ask him if it was worth the suspension. He said it was and the bullying stopped.
He learned a lot with that one incident, and I learned a lot about my little boy. :)
I'm a retired school administrator and I still say that sometimes a person has to do what is right to protect themselves, whether it's against the rules or not. As long as they make an informed decision and are willing to accept the consequences.
You gotta do what you gotta do. ;)
 

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We taught our kids to never start a fight, but never back down either. They were not allowed to throw the first punch but they were allowed to clean their clocks if struck. When I went to school some girl walked up to me & told me I couldn't stand on the sidewalk to the front doors of the school. (this was during recess) I knew the bell was going to ring so I was waiting. I told her I can stand were I want & she open hand slapped me across my face. (head went from left to right in a second flat) I grabbed her by her shirt & pushed her towards the doors of the school. her fat a$$ hit those bar things & we both fell onto the lobby floor. (me on top) I commenced to punching her in the face. A gym teacher came over & tried to pull me off her but I heard the history teacher tell the gym teacher to leave me alone that she (the girl) was getting everything she deserved because he had seen the whole thing & she started it. You have the bullies who will start the fights & you have the victims who will finish it. This is what is wrong with this world. You are not allowed to defend yourself anymore & the so called school system doesn't do anything about it. We taught all 3 of our kids to not take crap from bullies, if you do they will just keep on doing it. Don't get me wrong, we tried it their way, reporting the bullies to the bus driver & the principle. The bully was talked to. this did no good. Finally towards the end of the school year we told our son that if that kid jap-slapped the back of his head again (this was on the school bus) he was to turn around & punch that SOB right in the nose. He did & the bus driver was all over him. She stopped at our house to say she was going to report this & our son would be suspended next year. I told her while she was at it she had better report that our son told her all year about this kid hitting him in the back of the head & all she ever told him was to "sit down & shut up & to quit being such a baby. I also told her to tell that kid with the bloody nose to quit being such a baby. We did find out later that the bully she kept sticking up for was the son of a good friend of hers. (no wonder nothing got done about it) but anyway she never did turn it in. I guess what i'm telling you is have your kid wait for the bully to hit first & then have your boy clean his clock.
 

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Subculture
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All it takes is that one time you stand up and the bullying usually stops. It worked for me in the 6th grade. This 8th grader would run by me and punch me in the back or grab my hair and pull it against the grain. I caught hold of his hand once and bent 4 of his fingers back...until 2 of them broke. I was told by my grandfather that I would know when and what to do. My uncle gave me the heads up on the finger trick. Word got around real quick like that I was some kind of ninja. I have only been in a few fights after that. None from bullying. He doesn't have to break bones, but he should at least stand up to the punk. A little bravery can go a long way.
 

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I taught my sons that no matter what you walk away till you cannot do it anymore and then you deal with it...and deal with it hard.

A kid has to be able to defend themselves and not walk around scared that what ever he does is going to get him in hot water...

I say you as a parent make one last effort to talk to the trash parents of the bully, and then tell them your son is going to defend himself if it continues and then that will involve the law getting involved... usually trashy folks do not want the cops anywhere's around them... that may get their attention a little, and if it does not.... call the law if it happens agaain and then let your boy deal with it and deal with it hard and quick...
 

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Should kids physically defend themselves?

Of course not. Standing up for yourself is a bad idea. You best be careful there, mister. Let that kid develop too much self confidence, and you're going to end up with a little monster on your hands. All sorts of antisocial behaviors could result - self reliance, independent thought, a general desire to question authority...it'll be chaos!

No, really, my ex-stepdaughter rode the short bus. She wasn't "mentally challenged", or "had a learning disability"; she was just plain retarded. Learned slower than other kids, so she was picked on. We taught her to fight back. Not to let other people walk on her, or let them make her feel bad about things she couldn't control. Guess what? She had a job and her own apartment at age 18, while the "normal" kids were still living in the parent's basements. That was about 15 years ago. Now she runs her own animal care business for battered pets. Go figure.
 

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Potential Roux-Ga-Roux
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I was always taught to never pick a fight, but never run from one. And, make the first punch count. :thumb:
 

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Zombie Ron Paul 2016
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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
If he's off school property - Yes
If he's on school property - NO

Most schools have a zero-tolerance policy for violence and your son will get in more trouble than the bully.
I guess it's "lucky" in this case that the bully is in the neighbourhood not at school. I know schools are completely stupid on the idea of self defense.
 

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defend against tyranny
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a guy I work with (Wes) has a son. at school a few days ago, the school bully pushed him down, and his kid started throwing punches and beat the sh!t out of the bully. wes got home and yelled at him and told him he shouldn't have stopped until the teacher pulled him off.

FYI: Wes works at the county jail, so he's a pretty tough guy.
 

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Things are different in the world today than when I was a kid. Some buddies and I had this karate book (before it was cool) and would practice some of the stuff we read about. I remember the book teaching how to make a very hard fist by extending your hand and crunching the fingers into a fist each joint at a time. I may not have described it very good, sorry! But in the end your fist is as hard as possible. We would practice making that fist as fast as possible and executing a punch with all the force possible using our whole body as power! The target was the nose of the opponent. We would hold up a makeshift punching bag and punch over and over as practice.

If used as we practiced, it only required one punch and the disagreement was truly over! I would NEVER tell my child not to punch first. Normally that first punch is the only one that matters!:)
 

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Please do teach him HOW to defend himself first.
Thank you as I think this is an excellent point. When a child has the knowledge and ability to defend him/her self it gives them self confidence that lasts a lifetime. It also shows as they walk down the hall of the school building they have that stride, that grace that gives the body language not to mess with me! Does that sound silly? It really is not so silly when you can whip most of the kids in your class without breaking a sweat. Teach your child how to defend themselves, it is a valuable lesson that lasts a lifetime! :thumb:
 

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Tough Chick
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Without knowing more, I can't give an honest answer.

You describe the bully's behavior as being "kind of a jerk" but give zero examples of how this is manifested.

I think you need to teach your child how to be a strong man of character.

If "kind of a jerk" means the boy is teasing, or using verbal threats, assaults, etc, then I think your son should be taught how to diffuse the behavior, such as by throwing jokes back, ignoring the bully, walking away, etc.

If "kind of a jerk" means he's being physically attacked in any manner, then I agree with the others who say to teach your boy when and how to fight back.

Edited to add:
Several drivers were being "kind of a jerk" on the highway this morning. Should I find them and knock them out?
 

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I agree with oktx, exactly what kindof bullying goes on at 5 yrs old? I've had three go through that age . . . I wouldn't call anything my kids experienced "bullying." Teasing yes, getting made fun of maybe, but bullying to me is physical.
 
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