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I am currently deployed to Iraq, I won't be home until shortly before Chirstmas. My girlfriend emailed me the other day with some unsettling news, she is pregnant, just 2.5 months along, so I guess it happened when I was home on leave. I am just a mix of emotions right now because we were not planning on kids just yet, we have just went through a previous pregnancy where my sister and her husband ended up adopting our little girl when she was born.

Things happen I know, but Iam just worried about how my family is going to react to this, and scared on not knowing if we are making enough money once I go back to my civilan job, we were barely making it before I left. I am excited because we do want kids and I think Iam ready to settle down and have a family.

We currently are renting a fair sized trailer, two bedrooms, that is on ten acres of land, have been talking to my landlord about buying everything from him, and just live in the trailer until we can finish building a house. Most of my prepareness plans must take a pause until I can find a better job, or once my girlfriend can go back to work. We are planning on getting married soon, probably will wait until after the child is born so that she won't have a bubble of belly when she will wear her dress.
 

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Damn man, second unplanned kid eh. CONNNNNDOOOOMS from now on!!:D:

But listen. Everything always works out in the end! No matter how bad it gets. That is my mantra for life that my dad always used to say and has made me the person I am. It does and it will. It sound like you have a supportive family even if it may be a bit of a shock to them and take them some time to swallow the news. Thats okay and normal. I am sure it will pass.

I love the idea of buying the land and the trailer! If that is something you can swing financialy it would be a GREAT move. (assuming you like/have family/jobs in the area) Buying that would be a huge part of "preparedness"! So that would not be on hold.

So now you have even more reasons to be as save as possible over there. Be safe and get your but back here!! Don't worry and Good luck!
 

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I guess all I can say is congratulations! Sometimes things happen unexpectedly, but always remember there is a purpose for everything that happens.
 

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Just do yourself and the little woman a favor and get your mind clear and stay focused on your task at hand. Shes gonna need you back in the same condition you left. And thank you for your service.

May God bless you and the family.
 

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Just do yourself and the little woman a favor and get your mind clear and stay focused on your task at hand. Shes gonna need you back in the same condition you left.
And bring condoms...... :thumb:

I know, its like going to a buffet with a sock on your tongue....
 

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*** Forgives, I don't
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Dude, I just don't know about you. You are a contradiction. It sounds as if you are very young and trying to play grown-up. You give away your first child, get her pregnant again and THINK you're ready to settle down and raise a family. You're worried about money because of the job you are going back to doesn't pay alot. You're renting a trailer on 10 acres but want to buy it and live there while you build a house. I assume you're in a National Guard unit and not regular Army. YOU really need to get your head screwed on right, IF you were serious, why not stay active military? The pay is good, damn good benefits (free medical, housing etc) I think its time you "cowboy uped"!
 

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My advice is not to sweat it. Worrying over things never channges it and doesnt help a damn thing.

I know its hard and scary when its happening to you, but you know what, life is an adventure for everyone, no one is immune. ANd its odd because no matter how bad it seems when were knee deep in the middle of it, when you look back, it was really never that bad. We just magnify **** because were in it.

As already said, keep your head screwed on straight, get you some perspective, and try to enjoy the ride. If you can make yourself view it like that, even hard times are pretty fun to go through.

And dont take this the wrong way, but you also may be better served spilling your guts to a Chaplain or your girl friend more so than on a message board to a bunch of strangers. No offense to you or anyone here, I just have never understood airing my dirty laundry in such a ways.

Regardless best of luck.
 

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I have one child which ,although was planned, I was young and still didn't see that it wasn't the best time for a child.

I had to look at what I wanted for my family and work harder for it. I went back to school while working so that I could get a better job that would provide the things we needed. It was a tough choice to follow through with but its paying off. Keep doing what you need to do. Its the tough choices that will define who you are as a man and even a father. Those tough choices will often test the strength of your union, marriage or not.

Good luck.
 
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Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you choose to react to it. I was a dad at 19. Its no big deal, boot up, handle it, you will be better for it
 

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ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒ&
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Well, now your prep plans have officially shifted to baby needs and family forming. You may want to start thinking about the adopted child situation with your sister. There is a whole truck load of complications there that would need a new thread to cover. I don't know about you, but it would be awfull awkward for me to have my children growing up thinking that they are cousins.

Good luck to you and yours and best regards.

PS--read my avatar....
 

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Bro,
It is all about perspective. You will regret giving away your first daughter. You have what it takes to be a husband and father. Things look dark now, but if you do the right things, eventually your past will look good. You would have overcame challenges and persevered. The gospel is full of wisdom. Life is a blessing. There can be some good stuff on message boards you may not pick up face to face with a jerky person.

My perspective: Our society holds people back. We should encourage maturity not delay it. It causes many kids to have a failure to launch. It is time to take ownership of your life. Give you life to Jesus than read the Gospel Mathew, Mark, Luke, and John. Make an effort to find a good pastor don't pick the first one maybe talk to a few. Read some books that will build you as a person. Talk to people who have similar experience. Leave that pop culture junk behind and start your life.

Thank You for your service to our country.
God Bless.

PS Fear is believing something bad will happen.
Faith is believing something good will happen.

God made ya. Have faith you got what it takes. God brought you to it. He will get you through it.

Work like it all depends on you, and pray like it all depends on God.
 

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At this point in time, the military is one of the best places to start a family. Stay focused on the job at hand, that is currently the most important mission you have. When deployment is over go home and get to know your family. Spend twice the time with them that you spent away from them. Then think about what life has to offer you and yours. Your world can be as big or as small as you make it.
 
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