Islam declares war on ANIMALS!

This is old, tired news. They've done this a lot of times, so, it's not horribly surprising. It's like beating a dead... donkey! Ha-HA! Seriously, though, imagine if the donkey had survived. Just had all this explosion going on and then was like "whatev," and walks it off. Then, what if the donkey turned out to be Jewish, joined the IDF, became a commando and went on a rampage extracting revenge upon his captors and freeing his donkey brothers? I believe, gentlemen, that would be poetic justice. Then he gets a movie deal, Brad Pitt plays the donkey and he retires a rich old donkey with all sorts of donkey ladies and bling and a mansion with a swimming pool and a helicopter. That, would be extra poetic justice. PETA would rejoice, everyone else would rejoice but not care about PETA still and the donkey could finally munch grass, or whatever donkeys do for fun, in peace.