Within my circle, only my closest next-of-kin knows of my preparations and survivalist mentality.

None participated or express any interest in what I am doing/preparing. None of them came between my way neither do I let such activities/mentality affect my daily life with them. They just me alone to do what I want/like, but once a while just voice out requesting me not to spend too much money on gears/preparation work.

 

Thats how I roll. Kinda stress the point that the preparedness is to take care of everyone you care for, and no one ever regretted being prepared....
Plus, it doubles as great hobbies, I regularly use most of my equipment.

 

My wife knows

I talk to my wife about what we need and what we need to do. She helps me go after it and she helps me stay reasonable. If I didn't have some kind of checks and balances in place I would try to buy everything we need in one huge shopping spree. With her to keep me in line I can buy a little here and there and she helps me see things I miss. Additionally my wife is from another country so her family sends us inexpensive antibiotics. If you wife won't support you in something you feel strongly about the first thing you might want to do is work on your relationship and make it strong for TSHTF.

Thanks,
Rob

 

If you really feel that she will laugh or make fun of you or even worse discuss it with others, you need to take a good hard look at who you've chosen for a spouse.

That being said, I would arm myself with some basic facts and data from various reputable places. Slowly begin to bring up discussions.

Examples:
1) I see here that Homeland Security and the Red Cross recommend that we get a disaster kit in place with food and water for 72 hours and to be prepared to fend for ourselves for at least 2 weeks.

2) Discuss articles you "find" about economic meltdowns around the world. Look for information on how things tend to fall into chaos and talk about your fears.

I would keep at this for a while and then I would say something like, "Look, I think we need to get a real family plan in place. I want to feel that I'm doing my job as a husband and protecting you (and kids if there are any). Let's talk about things we can do that will help us feel safer." Then SHUT UP and let her talk.

If she is shallow and immature this probably won't work but if she has the ability to use reason and logic as well as compassion, she will listen and get on board before you know it.

PS: I am the wife who prepped before I met my husband. I told him when we began dating seriously. He now is very proud and just the other day said, "I'm so proud to be married to someone who can take a raw bird and turn it into food." LOL. There is hope.

 

If I can't handle my wife laughing at something I do then we would have been divorced 1000 times over already. Most of the time she has good reason to laugh.: I don't have marital problems.. that I know of.. Sorry you read into something thats not there. I just want to have advice on breaking the ice vs. hiding I guess.
Thanks for the input.

 

My wife sort of ignores me when I get like this. Last time she gave grief was for buying a kerosene heater and 20gal of kerosene, then a week later we had an ice storm and were without power for a week. She's been strangely surpportive of the bulk grain and grinder and other stuff. She's probably gonna use it as grounds for divorce.

 

Cranky. I think this is how it will go for me as well. haha

 

Good! A good marriage is good, but hiding thousands of dollars worth of gear and food might just change that. The turning point for my wife was hurricane Ike and living without power for eight or nine weeks. However, that was an eye opener for us both. Then there is been a lot of hope and change in our world that makes us want to prepare for what most economists say is unsustainable.

Start emailing her articles by mainstream news sources. They are really hard to find, so when you find one its enough to scare the explosive laced panties off anyone. After reading a few of those you will have an open dialog. She will see it as you trying to provide for her, and she will love you even more.

 

I explain everything like insurance. Do you have insurance on your house? car? life insurance? Health? Are you investing for retirement? This is the same thing only with consequences on a much larger scale. I think the only waty you can really be prepared is if she is on board. So the answer is....... tell the truth! Just my opinion. Best of luck

 

My mother and I are the ones trying to be prepared. My husband was fairly easy to get to go along with us. My father was slower to warm up to the idea but is now completey on board. I found that articles and books helped him along. What we were saying he started hearing on the news. FOX news that is.

 

I think its a good idea to let them know if you have a bag packed in case you weren't around when it was needed.

 

Every area of the country has environmental dangers. The east just suffered a nice little blizzard. Here in GA a month or so ago we had a hell of a flood north of Atlanta. I bet at sometime in her life she has experienced a flood, ice storm, hurricane, something. Use that to help you bridge the gap.

Also dont go crazy. There are methods to prepping. "copy canning" is one such method. In short, every time you use one can of food go to the store and buy two. After a month of this you will have a two month supply. You can continue this till you are comfortable with your preps.

I suggest you make a plan. Here is a guideline.

1. What disaster will most likely befall me? (for me its tornado, unemployment, rioting)
2. What essential preps will be needed for all emergencies? (water, heat, food, electricity, security)
3. What disaster specific preps do i need? (generators, a bank account with 6 months worth of money to pay the bills, plywood)

Now take one disaster at a time for your list and prep for that. Dont get caught up in the paranoia. More destruction in the US is dont by hurricanes then economic collapse. Prep for what has historically happened in your area.

If you go to your wife spouting about the collapse of society and the US economy then you can expect a lifetime of resistance that will come down to your marriage or your preps.

 

This is exactly how I started doing my preps. I've always kept plenty of food on hand (we used to only get paid once a month, so had to make sure we had enough food to last, PLUS enough to go another month "just in case".)

When we were stationed in Germany during the "Cold War" years, we were REQUIRED to have an "evacuation" bag (AKA BOB) for each member of the family, packed and ready to go at a moments notice. THey also did annual drills where we had to pretend we were evacuating, go to the assembly point, and they checked our paperwork and bags, and told us about anny "deficiencies" that needed to be addressed.

We now live in an area that is subject to frequent weather-related power outages, as well as having a history of less frequent (about once every 35-40 years) but catastrophic floods. (I made sure we bought a house up on a mountain well OUT of the flood plain!) Also, winter weather has shut down the highways for days at a time, disrupting the supply chain.

I justified my preps by using the above situation to be able to "weather the storm". (OK, so the storm could last a year or more...). Although my husband HAS teased me about my stash in the past, he certainly finds it convenient that we always have everything we need "on hand" and don't have to make "emergency" runs to the store, or do without something when the store runs out of an item and takes 2 months before they can restock it because the warehouse/distribution center ran out, as well.

 

I'm not married, but like some people are saying, thousands of dollars of preps being "Found" would probably do nothing to bolster trust and loving relationship. Breaking the ice is probably the best thing to do and explain your thought behind prepping. Make sure you rotate your stock and show how you're saving money or getting some sort of benefit or the benefit you will get when something happens. I've always like the "Well, why do you have a fire extinguisher? It's not because you're planning on a fire, it's just in case since there is the risk" type argument. But, like I said, not married so I never really have to explain anything to anyone.

I do have a comical image playing in my head of a women sliding the recliner lever in the right combination to open up a wall to your preps, finding guns, some ammo, a box of pop tarts, and 30 cases of beer.

Pay no attention to that second part.

 

Rule #1: Don't try to hide anything from your spouse. You're basically lying when you do that and it's a bad habit to get into.

I've been broaching the subject gradually for a couple of years now and my wife's basically with the program. She doesn't quite have the fervor that I do, but appreciates the utility of being prepared for disaster.

 

Go on and tell her. My wife knows; and she thinks im a bit paranoid at times, but as long as i do not spend big $ all the time she is cool with it. Don't hide it.

 

If this is something that's important to you why would you feel the need to hide it from the woman you plan on spending the rest of your life with?

 

I've tried. She thinks you, I and anyone who thinks in this manner is insane. I know it can happen. Probably will.

I prep for my son and I. I honestly don't care about me (and frankly, to hell with her)...I just need to keep me alive long enough to ensure he stays alive.

She can do as she pleases; so will I.

 

I don't hide anything, but she's clueless about how precarious life can be. She doesn't complain about what I do. Too hard to hide preps in a small home.

 

Sorry, dude, but you ain't gonna hide anything from your wife. Period. So go ahead and get that thought out of your head.

Now that we've established this (and I dare ANYONE to disagree...), here's my outtake on your problem. I was in the same boat as you not too long ago. I told her this was something that we needed to do, and that I was going to do this whether she thought I was crazy or not. She was supportive and helps out. She also has come to the understanding that she is to tell no one about it.

 

Tell Her -

My wife loves it. -"You've always been so hard to buy for (Christmas, birthdays) - now I have lists"

& she is fine with being prepped, but considers it a hobby. "Better than sports cars and bimbos as a midlife crisis" - yup - I get laughed at...

- but we both see the US empire in decline, and want to protect our children any way possible.

 

While hiding things from your wife is not the best arrangement, it is better than no arrangement at all. "I told you so" is cold comfort when SHF. This brings up the valuable and sneaky skill of caching, as in to cache, or stash your stuff in a hiding place that not only your wife cannot find, if she is of the ostrich mentality, but that government forces or competing survivors of calamity are not likely to find. When constructing a cache, you need to consider such factors of storage as water resistance, insect and animal resistance, and accessibility, and also the advantages anyone might have who might wish to deprive you of your stash, like metal detectors. A wife of the ostrich mentality will be the first one to expect to be taken care of, so I would use her for a practice adversary in the sneakiness and cunning required to create a useful cache. Just don't let the deception bleed out into other areas of your relationship. Compartmentalize it. Everyone has their little secrets.

 

"I told you so" is cold comfort

It is also not advisable to say this to the wife...

 

OK guys. I'm going to talk to her about it tonight. I will post later tonight what goes down.

 

Please do keep us updated.

 

+1 on tell the wife. If she is like mine, she probably already knows what you're thinking before you do.

You live in the southwest. Give her a water bottle for the car because it may quit running on a hot day. Put a first aid kit, a few basic tools and a pair of jumper cables there too. Teach her to use the stuff or write up instructions. You don't want her to be uncomfortable if it breaks down. May as well make it a Get Home Bag (GHB). Teach her why each item is important. If you use anything in your GHB, tell her about it. If you see anyone on the news who could have used the stuff in her GHB, point that out. Show her http://ready.gov.

Check the smoke detectors in the house. Check home security too. Get a first aid kit and some basic tools. Explain what you're doing and why. Use real world examples where they would have been useful to friends, family, local news, etc. Organize the family important papers. Scan them and put them onto an encrypted flash drive. Anyone could lose a wallet. It sure was nice to be able to find that document while you were on vacation, etc. Get a couple weeks of staple foods for the pantry. Keep a couple weeks of water on hand. It is cheap.

Have there been kidnappings or takeover roberies in the local news? Show her where the guns and ammo are stored. Teach her to handle guns safely and how to shoot.

Start a budget. Live within your means. Save for a rainy day. Pay off loans. Need cash on a day when you're too busy to go by the bank? Keep a little cash around the house. Banks failing? Hedge your investments with a little precious metals.

Like fresh organic vegetables? Start a garden. Like the outdoors? Go camping together. Watch the news and discuss your concerns. Take things slow. Listen a lot. Prep for the likely scenarios.

 

For me it was to tell My wife that i was a nut and that i was trying to do the best that i can for the just in case times.

I had to laugh last week when we had the snow over Christmas as when i came home the wife looked at me and said that she went shopping, i looked at her with as strange look as it was snowing hard and i even had a hard time coming home from work. The shopping that she did was in the Basement pantry so she could bake cookies etc. she then gave me a list that she took so we could replace when we went shopping again.

I found that with time and convieniance( of the pantry) my wife does not think that i am so much of a nut but a father and husband that is looking out for his family and his familys future.

ozziepom.

 

I tell my wife it's all just basically earthquake prep stuff. She's on board with the MREs and the stored water. She knows I have flashlights and rope and stuff, but I don't make a big deal out of it. I do all my prep organizing in my garage.

My garage is like Vegas, what happens there, stays there. I tell my kids it's "daddy's magical workshop". The wife doesn't even bat an eye on anything in there anymore.

 

I've always liked the more drastic approach. When she's out of the house, empty the fridge, disable your well or shut off the main water supply and shut off the main power to the house. When she comes home, just play stupid. After a couple of hours, just mention how nice it would have been if you were more prepared for such an emergency. Hope that helps. I must disclose that I'm am not the best person to ask about marital advise. It might just get you a divorce.::

 

I cannot imagine not telling my wife about anything this important. We basicaly share everything, and IMHO its because we are Christians. She has a sense about things that I dont have, and after 25 years of marriage I have learned to listen to her when she is concerned about something.

If you dont tell her you will be missing out on a part of your team that may very well save your collective butts in a SHTF.