Survivalist Forum banner

1 - 20 of 59 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
60 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
I am wondering how you broke the ice or does anyone prep without the SO knowing? Im pretty sure I will be laughed at. And she will most likely tell her family and others to poke fun at it.

Is it better to hide it from her? Anyone else do that? I have hunting/fishing stuff so I can hide alot in that stuff but water filtrations and food etc will be real hard.
 

·
Asian Newbie
Joined
·
322 Posts
Within my circle, only my closest next-of-kin knows of my preparations and survivalist mentality.

None participated or express any interest in what I am doing/preparing. None of them came between my way neither do I let such activities/mentality affect my daily life with them. They just me alone to do what I want/like, but once a while just voice out requesting me not to spend too much money on gears/preparation work.
 

·
pack light, move quietly.
Joined
·
556 Posts
My wife knows

I talk to my wife about what we need and what we need to do. She helps me go after it and she helps me stay reasonable. If I didn't have some kind of checks and balances in place I would try to buy everything we need in one huge shopping spree. With her to keep me in line I can buy a little here and there and she helps me see things I miss. Additionally my wife is from another country so her family sends us inexpensive antibiotics. If you wife won't support you in something you feel strongly about the first thing you might want to do is work on your relationship and make it strong for TSHTF.

Thanks,
Rob
 

·
Tough Chick
Joined
·
2,981 Posts
If you really feel that she will laugh or make fun of you or even worse discuss it with others, you need to take a good hard look at who you've chosen for a spouse.

That being said, I would arm myself with some basic facts and data from various reputable places. Slowly begin to bring up discussions.

Examples:
1) I see here that Homeland Security and the Red Cross recommend that we get a disaster kit in place with food and water for 72 hours and to be prepared to fend for ourselves for at least 2 weeks.

2) Discuss articles you "find" about economic meltdowns around the world. Look for information on how things tend to fall into chaos and talk about your fears.

I would keep at this for a while and then I would say something like, "Look, I think we need to get a real family plan in place. I want to feel that I'm doing my job as a husband and protecting you (and kids if there are any). Let's talk about things we can do that will help us feel safer." Then SHUT UP and let her talk.

If she is shallow and immature this probably won't work but if she has the ability to use reason and logic as well as compassion, she will listen and get on board before you know it.

PS: I am the wife who prepped before I met my husband. I told him when we began dating seriously. He now is very proud and just the other day said, "I'm so proud to be married to someone who can take a raw bird and turn it into food." LOL. There is hope.
 

·
My Temperature is Right
Joined
·
5,578 Posts
My wife sort of ignores me when I get like this. Last time she gave grief was for buying a kerosene heater and 20gal of kerosene, then a week later we had an ice storm and were without power for a week. She's been strangely surpportive of the bulk grain and grinder and other stuff. She's probably gonna use it as grounds for divorce.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
60 Posts
Discussion Starter #6
If you really feel that she will laugh or make fun of you or even worse discuss it with others, you need to take a good hard look at who you've chosen for a spouse.

That being said, I would arm myself with some basic facts and data from various reputable places. Slowly begin to bring up discussions.

Examples:
1) I see here that Homeland Security and the Red Cross recommend that we get a disaster kit in place with food and water for 72 hours and to be prepared to fend for ourselves for at least 2 weeks.

2) Discuss articles you "find" about economic meltdowns around the world. Look for information on how things tend to fall into chaos and talk about your fears.

I would keep at this for a while and then I would say something like, "Look, I think we need to get a real family plan in place. I want to feel that I'm doing my job as a husband and protecting you (and kids if there are any). Let's talk about things we can do that will help us feel safer." Then SHUT UP and let her talk.

If she is shallow and immature this probably won't work but if she has the ability to use reason and logic as well as compassion, she will listen and get on board before you know it.

PS: I am the wife who prepped before I met my husband. I told him when we began dating seriously. He now is very proud and just the other day said, "I'm so proud to be married to someone who can take a raw bird and turn it into food." LOL. There is hope.
If I can't handle my wife laughing at something I do then we would have been divorced 1000 times over already. Most of the time she has good reason to laugh.:D: I don't have marital problems.. that I know of.. Sorry you read into something thats not there. I just want to have advice on breaking the ice vs. hiding I guess.
Thanks for the input.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
60 Posts
Discussion Starter #7
My wife sort of ignores me when I get like this. Last time she gave grief was for buying a kerosene heater and 20gal of kerosene, then a week later we had an ice storm and were without power for a week. She's been strangely surpportive of the bulk grain and grinder and other stuff. She's probably gonna use it as grounds for divorce.
Cranky. I think this is how it will go for me as well. haha
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,548 Posts
Good! A good marriage is good, but hiding thousands of dollars worth of gear and food might just change that. The turning point for my wife was hurricane Ike and living without power for eight or nine weeks. However, that was an eye opener for us both. Then there is been a lot of hope and change in our world that makes us want to prepare for what most economists say is unsustainable.

Start emailing her articles by mainstream news sources. They are really hard to find, so when you find one its enough to scare the explosive laced panties off anyone. After reading a few of those you will have an open dialog. She will see it as you trying to provide for her, and she will love you even more.
 

·
We The People
Joined
·
227 Posts
I explain everything like insurance. Do you have insurance on your house? car? life insurance? Health? Are you investing for retirement? This is the same thing only with consequences on a much larger scale. I think the only waty you can really be prepared is if she is on board. So the answer is....... tell the truth! Just my opinion. Best of luck
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,064 Posts
My mother and I are the ones trying to be prepared. My husband was fairly easy to get to go along with us. My father was slower to warm up to the idea but is now completey on board. I found that articles and books helped him along. What we were saying he started hearing on the news. FOX news that is.
 

·
Keeper of Tomes
Joined
·
1,704 Posts
Every area of the country has environmental dangers. The east just suffered a nice little blizzard. Here in GA a month or so ago we had a hell of a flood north of Atlanta. I bet at sometime in her life she has experienced a flood, ice storm, hurricane, something. Use that to help you bridge the gap.

Also dont go crazy. There are methods to prepping. "copy canning" is one such method. In short, every time you use one can of food go to the store and buy two. After a month of this you will have a two month supply. You can continue this till you are comfortable with your preps.

I suggest you make a plan. Here is a guideline.

1. What disaster will most likely befall me? (for me its tornado, unemployment, rioting)
2. What essential preps will be needed for all emergencies? (water, heat, food, electricity, security)
3. What disaster specific preps do i need? (generators, a bank account with 6 months worth of money to pay the bills, plywood)

Now take one disaster at a time for your list and prep for that. Dont get caught up in the paranoia. More destruction in the US is dont by hurricanes then economic collapse. Prep for what has historically happened in your area.

If you go to your wife spouting about the collapse of society and the US economy then you can expect a lifetime of resistance that will come down to your marriage or your preps.
 

·
Plants don't run!
Joined
·
1,977 Posts
I'm not married, but like some people are saying, thousands of dollars of preps being "Found" would probably do nothing to bolster trust and loving relationship. Breaking the ice is probably the best thing to do and explain your thought behind prepping. Make sure you rotate your stock and show how you're saving money or getting some sort of benefit or the benefit you will get when something happens. I've always like the "Well, why do you have a fire extinguisher? It's not because you're planning on a fire, it's just in case since there is the risk" type argument. But, like I said, not married so I never really have to explain anything to anyone.

I do have a comical image playing in my head of a women sliding the recliner lever in the right combination to open up a wall to your preps, finding guns, some ammo, a box of pop tarts, and 30 cases of beer.

Pay no attention to that second part.
 

·
Spooky
Joined
·
1,698 Posts
Rule #1: Don't try to hide anything from your spouse. You're basically lying when you do that and it's a bad habit to get into.

I've been broaching the subject gradually for a couple of years now and my wife's basically with the program. She doesn't quite have the fervor that I do, but appreciates the utility of being prepared for disaster.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
149 Posts
Go on and tell her. My wife knows; and she thinks im a bit paranoid at times, but as long as i do not spend big $ all the time she is cool with it. Don't hide it.
 

·
Misfit Toy
Joined
·
2,185 Posts
I've tried. She thinks you, I and anyone who thinks in this manner is insane. I know it can happen. Probably will.

I prep for my son and I. I honestly don't care about me (and frankly, to hell with her)...I just need to keep me alive long enough to ensure he stays alive.

She can do as she pleases; so will I.
 

·
talks to strangers....
Joined
·
175 Posts
Within my circle, only my closest next-of-kin knows of my preparations and survivalist mentality.

None participated or express any interest in what I am doing/preparing. None of them came between my way neither do I let such activities/mentality affect my daily life with them. They just me alone to do what I want/like, but once a while just voice out requesting me not to spend too much money on gears/preparation work.
Thats how I roll. Kinda stress the point that the preparedness is to take care of everyone you care for, and no one ever regretted being prepared....
Plus, it doubles as great hobbies, I regularly use most of my equipment.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
274 Posts
I don't hide anything, but she's clueless about how precarious life can be. She doesn't complain about what I do. Too hard to hide preps in a small home.
 

·
strikes to the left
Joined
·
1,397 Posts
Sorry, dude, but you ain't gonna hide anything from your wife. Period. So go ahead and get that thought out of your head.

Now that we've established this (and I dare ANYONE to disagree...), here's my outtake on your problem. I was in the same boat as you not too long ago. I told her this was something that we needed to do, and that I was going to do this whether she thought I was crazy or not. She was supportive and helps out. She also has come to the understanding that she is to tell no one about it.
 
1 - 20 of 59 Posts
Top