This too shall pass.......

Tell him that most people get their heart broken at some point, I know I have!, welcome to the club! )
Dating and being married are not the same thing; the whole point is to discover these problems, better now than later.
Every heartbreak feels unique, it's part of life. But he will survive, he will eventually be able to see this in perspective, he will smile again. It just takes time.

 

Tough break but a right of passage if you're in a unit like he is.

When I was in, my marriage worked only because we were apart 9 months out of the year. Once I got out we couldn't be in the same room without fireworks.

He'll be alright, it may take some time. The best thing to get past it would probably be another girlfriend.

Good Luck

 

He made it through Ranger school...he'll survive this. I don't mean to be callous, and I won't say that this will not hurt, but he'll make it. The most important thing he can do is move on. Otherwise, he'll wind up being a detriment to himself and his team.

What's that old saying about, "If you love something, set it free...?"

 

You could tell him that water and dirt make mud:
2 very different career paths - it would be tough
________________
"FIRE IN THE HOLE"

 

My kid is a Marine training in California...His GF is in her first year at UNO. I expect the "Dear John" letter any day now!!

Your right when its time it will happen. I remember my "Dear John" letter, while I was upset I was relieved because I had planned on asking her to get married after my deployment!! The funny thing about it was she said Jody looked like me...He knocked her up and dumped her!!!

 

Most have received a Dear John in one form or fashion and is a painful part of life.

No advice but for a simple thank you to your son who has choose a path most do not.

 

Also, give him a hug for me (I have three sons) and tell him to wallow for a while, till he's sick of it.
I liked to watch old TV sitcoms, hard to be totally down in the dumps when Lucy and Ethel are shoving chocolates in their hats!

 

Tell him that there are plenty of girls on Victory Drive (AKA: VD Drive) in Columbus that will help him forget about her.

 

Through High School and College, I had exactly 10000000000000 girl friends give or take a few 100.

Break ups are apart of life when your 16-25 or so, he'll find the right one at some point. I know it's hard when your young especially if he reqally cared about her but he will get through it!

 

this will pass like a bad burrito..

 

Time and experience will help heal his emotional wounds. At the risk of sounding over-sentimental; only love can break a heart, and only love will mend it again.

He's got a lot going for him, as he's young and he sounds like a great kid, tell him to keep his chin up, and his chest out. He WILL be fine!

 

Thanks all for the comments. I know he'll get over it eventually. The first one is the worst one. That "Jody" is a real MF'er....I guess its easier to do nowadays. We never had the internet, Skype, Facebook etc. We had pen and paper.

He's got some really good friends in his unit, hopefully they will keep him busy. I'll buy those boys some beers when I see them next. Tough to think about a girl when your fast roping out of a Blackhawk at 70ft.....Lol.

 

Been there. Seen it a thousand times. It's more painful for guys who believe in loyalty and commitment. However most young troops ( when not otherwise gainfully employed ) are most preoccupied with when's payday and chasing skirts. In my experience the only thing that gets you over the last one is the next one. For what it's worth many young women in the military are prone to what I call "proximity romance". There are always too many young good looking men close by to compete for her attention and will not be detered. It's almost a lost cause from the beginning.

 

It is going to be a part of being in special units, you dedicate yourself to being the best at the profession of arms, sometimes families aren't part of that plan.

I do not regret any of them that did not work out, I agree with when it is right it will happen.

 

Got one from my fiancee when in the Army, tell him to forget about her and find a good woman. It hurt a lot, but looking back on it, glad it happened before we said I DO. I won't say what my opinion of her is now, it wouldn't look good on here. I found a good one though and have been married for the last 30 yrs.

 

Better a broken engagement than a divorce.

 

When a guy gets in the military and joins one of the combat arms, he can pretty well expect things like a domestic relation to come apart. When he goes further like become airborne, airborne recon, Ranger, Special Forces, Delta Force and so on girls begin to get real scared about their choice of man. The one girl I had in my Viet Nam days was always worried that I wouldn't be coming home alive. It practically drove her nuts with fear because we were engaged. When she studied up on paratroopers she darn near stroked out when she read that when paratrooper units do combat jumps that they automatically suffer a 25% casualty rate before they even fire a single shot. Tell him to, "Drive on." That's what good troopers do. They move forward and don't look back.

Then there is the other side of it. She's at the Naval Academy. She's planning to be a Navy officer. Navy officers don't want to be married to an Army sergeant. She's looking for another Navy officer of some sort with which to hitch up. So she's leaving behind a fighter for somebody who will probably become a pogue. Sad story but it happens all the time.

 

Kinda hits me a bit hard to hear this.....my marriage actually made it through all my deployments, but returned years later to bite me in the ass. I married young, and the first few years were pretty rough. Thought we had weathered the storm, but you just never know I guess.

Tell him to move on. Get all the grief and hurt out in whatever way works for HIM. Then move on. You can't live in the past, and dwelling too long on it will drive a man right over the edge. He's a Ranger though, and they some tough sons a bitches. Unfortunatley the training they get doesn't usually prepare a man for this kind of obstacle. He can apply the attitude though. After all, Rangers lead the way.....

 

regardless its still a totally ****ed up thing to do ****ing with someones mind when they need it to stay alive

all a dear john letter is is someone who is too much of a bitch to break up with someone in person hell wait till midtour to do it that way they have two weeks to safely be ****ed and distracted

 

Broken heart: A tougher test than Robin Sage.

 

Spoke to my son last night. He didnt even mention her name. I guess thats a good thing. He just told me about all the training they are doing. Did a train up on the SCAR and qualified again on the 240B. He sounds well.

I'm going down to see him over the Nov. 4th weekend. Hopefully he'll still be in good spirits. They deploy again soon, thankyou all for the comments and the advice.....M

 

Best of wishes to him!
Though it is rough, having time to really 'heal' is so important, to understand what happened (even if that is simply that sometimes people are unfathomable), rather than jumping right in to a new relationship! )

 

My only advice would be to remind him that this frees him up to find The One.

I do feel for him, though. I'd hate to go through that crap again.

 

in a combat unit such as his relationships will falter, all part of growing up, he'll be just fine