You do not need vital wheat gluten. I used it my first year, and found out later it is unnecessary.
Use a wheat naturally high in gluten, like red winter or golden 86.
If you want a lighter loaf, add around 1/2 to 2/3 of your flour to your liquids and yeast in the bowl. The measurement does not need to be exact. (This slurry is called a "sponge.")
Let it rise until double.
Then add your remaining flour keeping back about 1/4 cup per loaf. It will "punch down" as you mix it in. You may not need the last bit of flour. Add what you need of the last of the flour to make the dough manageable, (not too sticky to knead, but sticky enough that you still have to occasionally flour your hands. If you are using a machine, the dough will
just have begun to not stick to the bowel.) Knead it well. Pinch off a cherry to walnut size bit of dough, roll it into a ball and then pinching it between your finger is each hand and slowly pull it apart. You should be able to feel the dough stretch. If it doesn't feel elasticity and you can't stretch it 2 inches, then you need to knead it more.
Once it is good and springy, (it should still be barley sticky, so sprinkle flour on your counter and hands. The worse thing you can do is to add too much flour and have a dry loaf,) Oil the top of your dough and flip it over in your bowl. Cover it with plastic wrap or a towel to keep it warm and to keep it from drying out. Let it double the second time.
It is time to divide into loaf amounts and shape your loaves. Punch down first. Then divide it and shape for what you are making. You are going to let your loves rise until around double before baking. Cover them with a clean towel. Set them out of the way of any cool breezes. I set mine near my preheating oven. Because the dough already rose once as a sponge and again before you shaped it, it will rise quicker this last time.
Test it buy poking your finger tip into the edge of your risen loaf of dough. Not too deep, just the tip of your finger to almost your first knuckle. If the dough springs back to fill the indent, it should rise more. If it fills back about half the way, it is ready to bake. If it doesn't spring back at all, you have waited too long, so handle the loaves carefully as you put them in the oven, or they will fall. (If the dough is really gooshy you have waited way too long. Not all is lost. You will have take it out of the pans, punch it down and shape then again.)
The science behind the sponge stage:
Whole wheat flour is different than white flour.
It takes a while to absorb all the moisture it is going to absorb. This is why making a sponge first and letting it rise until double helps you have a moister and lighter loaf.
If you don't make the sponge you will end up adding too much flour to get to the point of where the dough is not too sticky to knead. Then while your loaves are rising, the wheat will still be absorbing the moisture and your loaves will be dry. They will also be heavier because you have added more flour than necessary to get the same sized loaf.
Why you knead the dough:
The fibers of the dough are microscopically shaped like long grains of rice. As you knead the dough, the fibers get aligned and are matted together in such a way that they form tight springy pockets that trap the gas that the yeast makes as it multiplies. This gives you lots of the little bubbles in your bread, making it light, fluffy, and just the right tender but not crumbly texture. If you don't knead your dough to springy stage, your bread will be heavy and crumbly.
Letting the dough rise:
By the time you have baked your bread it has rose once as a sponge, once as a mass, and once as loaves in the pan. It will rise a little more in the oven. This improves the weight, texture, and flavor. Overall, it doesn't take that much longer to rise, because the yeast multiplied in the sponge stage, giving you a quicker rise in the mass and loaves risings. Letting it rise to just the right amount as loaves get your tapped bubbles to the right size for a light loaf, but not so big that you end up with big holes that cause you bread to fall apart when sliced.
Between each rising you have also "punched it down." This is so all your bubbles are the same size and you get a nice even texture. Take the small amount of effort and time to "punch it down" well.
When is it done baking?:
Place your loaves as close to the center of the oven as you can vertically, leaving enough space between them horizontally so they don't touch as they rise that little last bit. A light fluffy one pound loaf only takes 20 to 25 minutes to bake. (If you are use to baking a poor quality loaf, that is much sorter than you are use to baking it.) You can if it is done by lightly thumping/tapping on the top with your finger. It should have a hollow quality in sound. If the bread pan was lightly greased, the loaf should come out when the pan is tipped over and tapped on the bottom. If it doesn't come out bake it another 5 minutes.
Let it cool on a rack or the your stove burners so the bottom doesn't sweat. If you like a soft buttery crust you can rub it with butter before it cools completely. For a shiny crust, brush the top with room temperature egg white during the last few minutes of baking.
When you are first switching to wheat bread, you can get your family use to it by using white flour for half the flour. This makes a lighter loaf and gives you time to learn the skills. Then slowly trend towards less and less white flour and more wheat flour.