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Old 09-29-2019, 11:02 AM
PAPrep99 PAPrep99 is offline
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Originally Posted by tblount View Post
You ARE a prepper if you know how much that old carpet weighs before you try to pick it up beside the highway.
Certainly familiar with that!
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Old 09-30-2019, 11:32 PM
Jenna Wick Jenna Wick is offline
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Originally Posted by Cool Hand View Post
You might be a Survivalist/Prepper IF...

- you can spout the location of every mosque, nuclear target, and possible civilian targets in a tri-state area.

- your wife has to remind you to leave the college fund money alone when puchasing "stuff".

- you have more money tied up in your BOV than you do your BOL.

- the local police chief calls you when the have a question about firearms.

- the Fire Department has you on the list as a source of available water during a time of crisis.

- You have enough experience with shaking cans so that you can tell what is in it even when there is no label on it.

- You know 15 ways to preserve meat, but can't answer the question "what's for dinner honey?".

- The aforementioned Fire Department has a map of your house indicating powder and silver storage (think falling safe) locations to be aware of if ever there is a fire.

- You know what a "fan Di-Pole" is and you actually have a six legged one on your property.

- Your three year old learned "the 10" of firearms safety before he even knew how to read.

- Your one year old practices OPSEC.

- You bought diamonds that had nothing to do with making a woman happy.

- You have 3 backups to every resource that enters your home.

- Your will is written so cryptically that the attorney calls it a "Scavenger Hunt".

- You have parts guns that support your backup guns.

- you know that hail and solar panels = SHTF

These are just a few of my own. Feel free to add more, I will as I go along. Some of these might be even more funny if they weren't so true...
"- Your three year old learned "the 10" of firearms safety before he even knew how to read."

Ha! I think you and my dad were separated at birth. I was one of them 3 year olds back in the day!
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Old 10-28-2019, 08:47 PM
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YMBAPI:

You know the exact day-age/weight new bunnies of various breeds should be killed to maximize meat-to-milk/feed ratio, AND encourage Mom to get pregnant again ASAP

During your last quarterly *walk,* you confirmaed your pace-count is still the same
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Old 01-28-2020, 06:07 PM
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- You don't drink tea but you stocked up when you heard that British soldiers used tea bags to stop bleeding from bullet wounds.
- You installed an over-sized muffler on your BOV and tested which tires were the quietest so they don't hear you coming when you bug out at night.
- You got giddy with excitement when you discovered you could use stinging nettles not only as area denial to cut off a way into your BOL, but eat them and make rope out of them, too.
- You've considered the feasability of raising soldier fly larvae as a food source.
- Your fallout shelter contains grow lights and an aquaponics setup.
- You've pondered whether, given a long enough run of pipe sloped uphill for the exhaust vent on your fallout shelter, you could condense and reclaim water from everyone breathing inside. A virtually endless supply!
- You've also wondered how bad the above water would taste.
- You've ever tried to see how long you could subsist on a diet of rice and beans.
- You added a fire sprinkler in your ammo and fuel storage areas since firemen coming into your house would breach OPSEC.
- Clearing out the field of fire around your house doubles as wildfire prevention.
- You laugh when people talk their 55 gal rain barrels since you've done the calculations on how much water you really use.
- Your running commentary on survival movies goes something like: he's going to freeze with that little insulation on his shelter; huh, that wasn't nearly so easy when I tried it; he thinks that lousy camo is going to keep him hidden? he looks awfully mobile for having just sprained his ankles; he's not sweating yet even though it's supposedly 100 degrees out; in the real world their radios would have dead batteries and somehow ended up on different frequencies.
- You've modified the low gas light on all your vehicles to come on at 3/4 tank.
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Old 01-28-2020, 06:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DanielKaplan View Post

snip

- You've modified the low gas light on all your vehicles to come on at 3/4 tank.
Lol, this made me spit out my beer. It's pretty much true though, I can't remember the last time I let my gas get below 1/2 a tank. I know it's not quite as obsessive as you, but I'm getting there.
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Old 04-01-2020, 09:33 PM
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While everyone is fighting for bread, milk, eggs, canned goods, toilet paper, and cleaning products at stores where the shelves have been stripped nearly bare, you aren't worried because you've got plenty on hand.
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Old 04-04-2020, 10:26 AM
DanielKaplan DanielKaplan is offline
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You might be a prepper if:
You avoid those "What's in your bag/backpack/purse" games because the spare magazine, Quick Clot, water filter, N95 mask, and emergency blanket, etc would blow your opsec.
Losing money is when you can't remember where you buried it or squirreled it away. My neighbor was reportedly a master at this.
You've ever considered using your doghouse as a hidden entry point for your shelter or one of your stashes like in Hogan's Heros.
You've written up the sheeple-survivalist scale to rank people according to how prepared they are.
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Old 05-02-2020, 01:21 AM
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Paravani Paravani is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hillbilly510 View Post
During a crisis the local pd comes to your house for ammo more powerful weapons and a quick snack and some water
Nope. OPSEC fail.
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